Tachatna's Journal, 21 February 2018

The internet has changed so many of our lives and opened our worlds to be in touch with people we would not ordinarily meet. Some of you aren't old enough to have been around when it all came to be an interactive community. I'm old as dirt, so I do remember when personal computers became affordable to the "average" person.

My first experience with internet communities was with AOL...version 1.1 if that tells you anything about my age! We connected with a MODEM and we were charged for long distance to connect there! It was quite a different experience than it is today.

In those days, there were chat rooms you could enter on different topics or connect with different age groups. There were children's rooms. There were Over forty rooms. There were Over 30 rooms. There were Christian rooms. There were rooms you could wander into to chat about any subject dynamic you were interested in. There were Guides to answer questions and eject disruptive or mean people. It was quite an experience.

I wandered into a room one day and watched the conversation. Someone made a comment I was curious about and then disappeared. I looked for them again to ask them a question, but wasn't ever able to find them. I decided to send them an email. A few days passed before I got an answer to the email. I had formed a vision of the person I had contacted with my question. When the email arrived, the person was nowhere close to the one I imagined. The person was male, not female to name just one thing I was wrong about. We started corresponding.

The person I met lived in Minnesota. I lived in Oregon. We talked about a lot of things in our emails. We instant messaged quite a lot. The person was extremely intelligent, considerate, easy going with a great sense of humor. The person was interested in what I thought and who I was. It did not take long before I realized this very special person was someone I wanted to know more.

The internet has expanded since then. The world has gotten smaller. We get news instantly. We connect with people on Facebook (for instance) who we haven't seen or talked to for years. We play games. We read books. We speak face to face through Skype and other programs. And, we have places to find people to connect with that face some of the same challenges that we have. Fatsecret is one of those places.

The internet is a challenge. The person you are talking to doesn't necessarily fit the picture you have in your mind.

They may face the same challenge, but it does not mean they are in the same place in life that you are.

Their backgrounds are varied and words may not mean the same thing to them that they do to you.

Their motivations and goals, hopes and fears, obstacles and successes may be quite different as well.

I have seen several instances of members becoming upset, of feeling hurt, of feeling discouraged by something someone has typed. The internet connections we make and the words we see are only a PORTION of who the person on the other end is!!! They have made themselves vulnerable to strangers by coming here. They have opened up parts of themselves that they may not share with others in real life. It behooves us all to tread carefully and be respectful as the internet allows us to visit someone else's life.

Every journey starts with a single step. It is possible they are not as far along the path to wellness as you are. They will find their way with support and caring, with celebration of their successes. They will find it as they feel safe enough to reach out and ask. Tread lightly on their fragile journey. Negativity can feel like a mortal wound.

Words can build someone up. Words can tear someone down. Words can cut like a knife and cause a soul to bleed rather than skin. Remember always....

THERE IS A PERSON ON THE RECEIVING END OF THE WORDS THAT ARE TYPED.

You have probably guessed that the person I met on AOL was my hubby Jan. You are right. It certainly was not something either of us anticipated! It was LONG before there were places like EHarmony, etc. It wasn't even something we were looking for and it all started with WORDS ON A SCREEN 23 years ago this summer.

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1059 kcal

Fat: 66.47g | Prot: 88.19g | Carb: 21.98g.   Breakfast: Boiled Egg, Boiled Egg. Lunch: Skinless Chicken Breast. Dinner: Boiled Egg, Boiled Egg, Hidden Valley Ranch Salad Dressing, Hidden Valley Ranch Salad Dressing, Chicken Breast, Crystal Farms Shredded Cheddar Cheese, Lettuce, Lettuce, Tomatoes, Chop't Cucumber. Snacks/Other: Popsicle (Sugar Free), Popsicle (Sugar Free). more...