I think that's a very valid point there and one that's hard to come by through the realization of. In many ways I understand what you mean though I'm also in the process of broading my friends group not because I don't like a lot of my friends but because either many of them have moved away after college or some of them unfortunately have passed away due to cancer, a couple of them do to suicide, and as much as I hate to admit it I lost a few friends when I told them I was very sick now granted their tent and play still my friends but I noticed a distance that seem to happen when I got sick if you know what I mean. Growth is good...if hard and good for you for realizing that it's time to grow. I champion your decision #fighting (still not sure if I'm using that right, lol 😆 )
07 Mar 24 by member: Leah_guffey
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Jenjabba - I totally relate to this and I am glad you are fighting for you, for your health and your happiness. I don't really have many friends - one who would not let me push him away and my sister - and as I get healthier I realize I also need to expand just a bit. So good luck to you in your journey for new friends - I hope you meet some amazing people!
07 Mar 24 by member: MommaCan
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Great attitude! Maybe explore your other hobbies -- classes or something that involves other people -- as a way to identify positive new friends?
07 Mar 24 by member: AncientHippie
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I can relate. I have no friends here now and a very sick hubby. Life is full of challenges. Sometimes we just have to tread water.
07 Mar 24 by member: -MorticiaAddams
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good for you for being strong in yourself and knowing what’s right for you. I’m sorry about the friend you lost. I hope you can meet more good people. It’s not easy making new friends, but it’s definitely possible!
07 Mar 24 by member: ddrudd
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You keep fighting and you are right age is not a factor. I am 60 and lifting weights and love it. However I have had friends say they rather be plump then they don't have to worry about the wrinkles. Hmmm......I think when they talk like that they are just jealous because we all know how much work it is to eat healthy and be fit. It is a daily part of our life job for the rest of our life. I have even had friends say that is all you are eating when we go out. I always just say yep- because I worked out and had a protein shake at the gym. Just keeping within my macros. I am at the age I don't care what they think - and I always say you do you. Proud of you for realizing they are toxic but hopefully you either get new friends or somehow you get them to shut up! LOL
07 Mar 24 by member: Redporchlady
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you were not rambling. this was perfect💙
07 Mar 24 by member: unity1234
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You know .... I hear you! I live out in the boonies and I call it Narnia because there is not one friend around here that I can do things with. My husband is the only friend I have and at times i want to ...... not murder him .... LMAO! .... but try to cope with him as he goes through his own issues. I lost a really good friend that lived in Texas and a few years ago she got the "flu" and died..... and she was the only reason I went to high school reunions. Friends are hard to find as we all live so far apart. I have made some great friends online ... here in FatSecret. It is what it is! I made keto fudge if you want that recipe. LOL! Helped me through a chocolate craving.
08 Mar 24 by member: Mom2Boxers
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It's hard when those around you don't support your healthy lifestyle. I'm lucky that I have friends & family that are very supportive. Hubby is my partner in crime....goes to the Gym with me & eats whatever I serve. Most of my friends are older & even if some are heavier than they'd like, they understand the importance of exercise & being active. In my case, what I eat isn't a stark contrast to what others eat. I eat most food, I just watch my portions when I'm away from home. My sister even downloaded the FS app to help her continue losing after she got a kick-start with Nutrisystem. I used to think I'd never get down to the size I was when I was younger. I'd get to a certain point & stop trying to lose more...eventually gaining at least some of the weight back. I am of the belief that being TOO thin will make me look older, so I've set a goal that is healthy but not in my opinion (for me) too skinny. Meeting new friends can be harder as we get older. Joining a sicial group or volunteering could expose you to new people.
08 Mar 24 by member: SherryeB
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Totally relatable. I decided to quit alcohol 19 months ago. Slowly, I lost contact with quite a number of girlfriends who used to go out and drink with me.
I also love the outdoors- I go camping, overlanding, kayaking, hiking.. I explore secluded, remote areas with my pup. My remaining girlfriends prefer to stay is 5-star hotels and don’t want to get dirty :) Don’t get me wrong, now and again I like staying in nice hotels and spa too but I also like to explore and appreciate nature in all its glory. Slowly, lost those girlfriends too.
As for healthy lifestyle, being fit, eating right the former girlfriends believe in those too. It is the quitting alcohol and outdoors lifestyle that didn’t vibe.
Today, I joined kayaking/canoeing and hiking club. I am making an effort to connect to like-minded people who believe that aging doesn’t mean we can’t challenge the status quo, that we can’t improve our health.
Keep forging ahead. :)
08 Mar 24 by member: Piper3707
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I know what you mean...when I found rst started on my fitness journey and I started to lose a good amount of weight, I got a lot of flack from my husband's family and some from friends. They thought I was secretly starving myself even though I would tell them different. My husband even told them I was eating alot, just much healthier foods. It took them a long time to stop badgering me.
As for loose skin..I do get loose, old lady skin, when I lose too much weight. A couple of lbs heavier and it's much better.
08 Mar 24 by member: Diana 1234
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Well your friend is completely misinformed. Hope you can lead her by example and not be taken down by her defeated attitude. It's hard to realize people set their minds on poor habits and don't recognize them for the damage they are doing to themselves.
08 Mar 24 by member: abbadabba
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I had a friend like that. notice the past tense. She'd spend our entire time together complaining about everything even as far back as high school. When I met David, I just stopped spending as much time with her until eventually we stopped all together because he was so happy and normal and she was such a freaking Debbie Downer- I only wanted to be with him. I hate miserable, depressed people. Maybe that's not the same as what you mean but you definitely need someone to applaud your efforts. Sounds like there is a fair bit of jealousy there, too. Congrats to you! 💕
08 Mar 24 by member: davidsprincess
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you right 💯 stay strong
if you want you will write me 😊
08 Mar 24 by member: Corystuvach
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Thanks for sharing that. You can choose your friends but you can’t choose your family. Your friend is clearly not supportive of your goals. I was recently diagnosed with diabetes. It was a shock but I needed that wake up call. A few years ago I was on fat secret daily and it allowed me to lose weight but I stopped and went back to my old ways. Gained more weight. Now I’m back and it feels good to see my weight coming down. I’m moving around more instead of just sitting and eating. I feel better already. I guess what I’m trying to say is don’t quit your program. If you eat cake or cookies every once in a while don’t quit. It’s a marathon not a race!
08 Mar 24 by member: Festivestorm
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I’ve had to purge people from my life. Some with warning, some I guess I just ghosted. Better for both of us in that instance.
08 Mar 24 by member: Katsolo
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unity’s statement 👍🏼
You have done an amazing job on your weight loss!
08 Mar 24 by member: kmtru
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We are who we choose to surround ourselves with. Our friends should be supportive and want the best for us. They should fan our flames and motivate us to be better through their actions. You have chosen to better yourself and take care of the vehicle your soul resides in. That is the ultimate gift to yourself as you age. It’s ok to let those who’d wish for you not to continue to learn, grow and improve as a human fall away. It makes room for people who will be positive influences in your life.
08 Mar 24 by member: ReverseCosmosis
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I can be negative. I work hard not to be.. as I also find that when the negativity of people who who always see the glass half full that is taxing. I hope you can find some good friends in your area! You deserve it
08 Mar 24 by member: liv001
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I am such a fan of classes and group exercise. I belong to both a Pilates studio and a yoga studio, and I've met a whole bunch of great, like-minded people. I used to belong to a running group, and that was fun, too. Weight lifting can be isolating unless you have a lift buddy, so if the gyms offer a body-pump class, maybe try one out. The more time you spend doing group activities, the less time you'll have to spend with the friends you no longer have anything in common with. It's a lifestyle change to be trim & fit, so I'd just treat it like a new chapter in your life.🥳💚
08 Mar 24 by member: JustBananas
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