|
I am attempting to take baby steps back to normalcy. It's really freaking hard to pretend you're getting back to normal when all along you've probably been insane. My first step today is logging everything I've eaten and drinking lots and lots of water. It also involves me grabbing my head a lot and chanting things like "Just stop" "Why? Why? Why?" and most recently "What the F? Seriously.. What the F??". I'm not positive.. but I think food stresses me out. The thought of eating less makes me want to eat more. The thought of eventually giving up carbs makes me crave hot pretzels.. I did give up sugar. JUST sugar. On Saturday. No candy, cookies, or.. um sugar. Although I did have extra extra coffee creamer this morning. Why? I don't know... That's why I grabbed my head and chanted "Why? Why? Why?" That's the diet side of things.
I'm still going back and forth on joining the work gym. I'm not sure if I have time. I know it would help a lot with stress and dealing with things but it could also be a waste of $200. Ehh..... I'm leaning towards yes.. someone push me before I start chanting something about squats and dumb bells.
Home life... Just shoot me. I just typed out a big ol thing and deleted it because it got way too personal. Short story is... having someone finally decide to try when they took everything for granted the entire time you were married.. sucks. It doesn't cause a yay warm fuzzy feeling! It makes you rehash all of the rejection and pain again and again and again. All those things you forgot or forgave.. they come back. After years in a relationship with someone who literally checked out, they didn't care or want me, and I decided I couldn't live like that. Now they are going for broke and saying and doing things they should have done from the very beginning. It feels false. It makes me realize that I wasn't even in his top 5 when it came to things that were important.. I was just too blind and stupid to see that. I stopped considering myself important or worthy. That's not a healthy relationship. This is not a healthy relationship.
Diet Calendar Entries for 07 August 2017:
|
2039 kcal
|
Fat: 74.70g | Prot: 101.66g | Carb: 246.32g.
Breakfast: Chobani Greek Yogurt Black Cherry on The Bottom, Atkins Snack Triple Chocolate Bar, Dunkin' Donuts Extra Extra Coffee Creamer, Coffee. Lunch: Zucchini, Johnsonville Original Bratwurst. Dinner: Bagel, Bertolli Chicken Florentine & Farfalle, Birds Eye Steamfresh Premium Selects Brussels Sprouts. Snacks/Other: Apples, Rold Gold Classic Style Tiny Twists Pretzels (Package). more...
|
|
2541 kcal
|
Activities & Exercise:
Elliptical - 30 minutes, Resting - 15 hours and 30 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
|
|
 Comments
Hang in there! It takes awhile but it will all work out. Join the gym. It will help get those feelings out.
07 Aug 17 by member: mickfan1
|
All I know is that happiness begins with you regardless of who you are with. Join the damned gym. There's your push.
07 Aug 17 by member: 2ManyCurves
|
Also---Carbs aren't the enemy. Signed, your non-Keto, WFPB friend.
07 Aug 17 by member: 2ManyCurves
|
I am pro carb. when done correctly; meaning mostly " slow" carbs not no carbs. I couldn't survive keto. Overeating, taking in more energy than the body use a. That causes fat storage. Carbs are energy too. Whatever works for you and makes you leaner, stronger& happy.
07 Aug 17 by member: 859klm
|
If you think you won't continue gym workouts, join planet fitness for a monthly deal. NO contract. I've joined 2 separate gyms with contracts and ended up not going but still had to pay. Edge gym is a month to month if there is one near you, try it. My opinion on your personal life. If he didn't care before, he will not care later. He needs a mother figure to let him do his own thing. Set your standards higher, you are worth it. No one should feel inferior towards another. Let him go find a mama who needs a daddy figure. I know easier said than done. There is an equal partner for you in that big ocean. Love yourself more and get what you want out of life. Good luck.
07 Aug 17 by member: skinnydebbie013
|
Breaking that sugar / carb addiction has been tough for me but it is a process that is getting better week. I am not a gym person so I started walking to build up my endurance and hope to move on to fun stuff like swimming and bike riding.
07 Aug 17 by member: Lil Tremps
|
Wow, I'm having a lot of struggles already and I began my Diet on Saturday. I am watching my fat intake. That seemed to help me when I lost so much 22 yrs. ago, then I stopped and gained it and more back in the last 12 yrs. No willpower, but watching Fat Grams is a little easier for me. Good luck.
07 Aug 17 by member: debbieasmithhinton
|
I have tried a million (yep, a million... I counted) times to quit sugar. It has literally driven me crazy, made me angry, caused me to cry uncontrollably, you name it. When I decided to go on this "diet" I am now on I chose not to give up sugar. Yup... I get to have sugar, just not as much. Instead of pouring sugar into my coffee and counting to 9 (yes, I used to do that... HOW DO I STILL HAVE TEETH?) I now put one teaspoon into it, just one. I don't use coffee creamer either, just almond milk. It took a little getting used to but I am feeling good and not having the huge sugar withdrawals like before. My other sugar vice is soda, that has been easier to cut back on than I thought. Artificial sweetener was not agreeing with my body so I tried flavored seltzer and I LOVE IT! I have a pepsi once in a while (once a week at most) and I allow myself a sweet snack as long as its not a huge one.
You can do this... I know exactly where you are coming from... sugar was my stress comfort food for a long time and I literally did not think I could do without it. The thought of giving it up actually caused me emotional pain.
I wish you the best of luck and I really believe you can do this!
07 Aug 17 by member: Betheroo
|
Dear DairyFarmersWife, I just read your bio. I believe it's from a few years back. Your goals are noble, but generalities fall short of answering the question "How do I get there?" You need daily strategy. As a lifelong sugar addict with a high tolerance for the stuff, I needed a *daily plan* to get off sugar after 63 years of abusing my body with high daily consumption. Also, to succeed, I had to make a *decision* and a *commitment* to literally saving my own life, whatever it takes, after 63 years of abusing my body with high sugar consumption. I wish I had done this years ago, but motivation is a funny thing.
07 Aug 17 by member: Miraculum
|
DairyFarmersWife, you might consider individual counseling to help sort out your feelings about your relationship. That is an essential step before making decisions that will affect your children's futures as well as your own.
07 Aug 17 by member: Miraculum
|
Food: I find it easier to get away from sugar etc when I plan delicious, abundant meals without it, rather than thinking that I'm giving something up. Also, not restricting amounts. Even if I gained weight at first, it felt so much better getting my body and mind clear of fast carbs. For example, I drank plenty of heavy cream in coffee and thick tea, never mind the calories. It'll even out in time. --- Relationship: look up "hoovering." (Not the urbandictionary dot com short definition, though.)
07 Aug 17 by member: T8U9
|
FWIW, at times in my life I've done really well with the approach Betheroo describes. Would have one tiny bite of dessert and simply not want any more. You'll find your path!
07 Aug 17 by member: T8U9
|
In a previous entry it was mentioned about changing your calling name from DairyFarmersWife, maybe it is time. If you don't want to be the wife or even if you do, maybe it would help to take stock (a punny) of who you are. You make me laugh and as much as I enjoy your posts, I read your pain. Take care, you WILL persevere and figure it all out.
07 Aug 17 by member: ginger dog
|
Dont give up carbs! Hear me out..... Carbs are in veg and fruit. Give up BAD carbs. :) Get yourself a copy of Dr Atkins New Diet Revolution (the last book he wrote) and follow it. let it inspire you. You don't need to starve. You can eat good food, feel great, and lose weight!!! As for men, sadly they can be very stupid. They court you, make you feel so loved then once they put that ring on your finger, you are base camp and they go off having a good old time. You can say you are unhappy, question what they do, it wont hit home. But if you then fight back, they are really shocked. Its a complicated subject. Been there, got the T Shirt..... We are still together. The journey was interesting.....
08 Aug 17 by member: Rindaloo
|
If you're not happy then your kids won't be happy. You must look to yourself and after yourself.
08 Aug 17 by member: minitata
|
I gave up sugar again a week ago. It's in everything!! There are also so many names for it too. It's a struggle but not one I can't handle. Don't give up 100% of carbs. Try sticking to under 25 and go ketogenic. There are a lot of benefits to it. My husband reversed his diabetes by just eating what I eat. Been that way almost 2 years now for him. Dietdoctor.com has a great 2 week low carb challenge. Has interchangeable menu's, shopping list and lots of great recipes.
08 Aug 17 by member: nyhardhat
|
be kind to yourself. please.
and remember that sugar effects your brain like cocaine- that's why it's *so hard* to control!
08 Aug 17 by member: anonymous111111
|
Be better, don't own the past... just leave it there (in the past). This is TODAY, we are HERE and you can have SUCCESS!
08 Aug 17 by member: From371to184
|
Exercise. Working out in my house works for me and I believe would work for anyone with kids and no motivation for the gym. Instead of spending 200 on a gym membership you will never use.
I walk down the stairs to be safe and up up the stairs then do 5 push ups every time I get at the top of the stairs. Plus squats and mountain climbers for 30 mins can be a good start. Good luck
08 Aug 17 by member: Graborn
|
| |
|
|
| |
Submit a Comment
You must sign in to submit a comment
|
|
|
Other Related Links
Members
|
Ms Elizabeth's weight history
|