Joy Rut

Hello, I am over 50, recently married, have 5 grown children, and 5 grandchildren. I have been trying to lose 20 pounds for over 4 years. I have decided to get aggressive this year. Not listening to anyone who says "Won't hurt" or "You can splurge just this once" or "You don't need to lose weight" or "it won't hurt you". My belly keeps getting bigger so any help with metabolism and diet will be greatly appreciated.