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My boss is attempting to suck my soul back out. I won't let her though. I refuse. She can't have it. It's mine!!! I've noticed at work that people are just.. well.. depressed. No one smiles, no one laughs, no one looks like they enjoy life. We're in a bad dilbert cartoon. ACK!! I really want to do something to make people wake up. I thought about spiking the coffee pot with something like prozac but that would probably get me in trouble. I could randomly decorate someone's cube for no apparent reason so they will come to work and wonder who screwed up and decorated the wrong cube because it isn't their birthday.. not that anyone decorates anyones cube for birthdays. That would be seen as clutter, a distraction from work, and an interruption to efficiency. So.. I'd have to be stealthy and not get caught. No joke.. I've been told since I got back we shouldn't have plants on our desks (oxygen is bad) and we should limit our work space to only 1 or two photoes.. in frames (because none of us should admit to having a life outside of work). I just put up a ton of snapshots of the kids with thumb tacks. I'm not taking them down. I'm feeling rebellious. Any suggestions for battling office zombies??? I would leave random cookies on desks but someone will be on a diet.. or hate cookies.
Foods pretty good despite yesterday being a complete cluster of poo. The sitter didn't feed squirt until noon because.. he kept falling asleep after she changed his diaper. Um.. what?!?!?!?!?!?! I'm looking for a new sitter with no success because we live in the middle of nowhere. I had to take both kids with me to get silo doors. Squirt cried the entire time which caused little man to cry the entire time so I attempted to distract him with McD's and got a latte for me. They gave me a small instead of a medium which was probably good, little man spilled his milk, and I nursed a baby on the side of the road while everyone and their brother slowed down or stopped to make sure we didn't need help..... now when I have a flat tire no one will stop.. or maybe they will. The men might at least. I may have just encouraged the men in our area to stop and help women on the side of the road.
I get home after a 2 hour adventure to more chaos that I would write about but this journal would never end. Needless to say I patted myself on the back for not dropping any pizza sauce on the babies head as I attempted to get ready for today, eat, and nurse a baby for hours on end.. because he was hungry.. because the sitter didn't feed him until noon!!!
Tonight.. I'm going to workout if I have to strap a toddler and a baby on each hip. I need the stress relief. I need a stiff drink. I need to spike everyones coffee with prozac because they are just adding to my stress.
Diet Calendar Entry for 10 October 2014:
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1055 kcal
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Fat: 34.59g | Prot: 52.57g | Carb: 134.00g.
Breakfast: Austin Cheese Crackers with Peanut Butter (39g), Coffee (Brewed From Grounds) , Atkins Advantage Cafe Mocha Shake, Dunkin' Donuts Extra Extra Coffee Creamer. Lunch: Great Value Frozen Tropical Fruit Mix, Lean Cuisine Culinary Collection Chicken Parmesan. Snacks/Other: M&M's Pretzel M&M's (Package), Chobani Nonfat Black Cherry Greek Yogurt (Container). more...
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 Comments
That really stinks about the sitter, you need somebody dependable that you feel good about leaving the baby with. Hope they get better or you find someone better.
10 Oct 14 by member: jmb3450
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You're so sneaky sneaky...love it :) I think a stiff drink sounds amazing!
10 Oct 14 by member: Socolova
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smile and wave, smile and wave
10 Oct 14 by member: wakamiya
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Try giving the sitter a schedule she has to keep and tell her you will doc her pay if she doesn't do her job.
10 Oct 14 by member: Kathy Vanish
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I think I had the same boss way back when. She told me that I should recycle my cans (back when I drank out of cans) rather than throw them away. Fair enough... I'll make her happy. Yeah, right. She told me where to put the cans. I put them there and took them out once a month. The result? It was in my job appraisal that I kept cans in the office too long. The result? Throw out the cans. Here's a very good phrase you can use with your boss. "Is it time for your medication or mine?"
10 Oct 14 by member: northernmusician
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You should hand out a memo on everyone's desk saying Monday is Hawaiian shirt day. I bet your boss would like that! You could also decorate your own cubical and leave it like that saying that you are celebrating your "unbirthday". Then ask everyone where your presents are:D
10 Oct 14 by member: fat2foxy
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Put a plant on your desk and stick some pens in the dirt.
"It's not a plant, it's a pencil holder."
10 Oct 14 by member: bmainwaring
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I saw one about a sign over the copier reading 'now voice activated' - just hang it and watch as people yell at the copier. Ok, I always yelled at our POS copier, but not in 'that' way. Soul sucking bosses & cubes... I'd lose it. Thank goodness vodka in orange juice would be undetectable; and hey, the baby would sleep better too :-)
10 Oct 14 by member: FullaBella
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I love the now voice activated idea!! I also love the pencil holder idea. I will have to use the label maker to indicate that the pencil holder is a pencil holder and the sign will have to be laminated but dang it I'm doing it.
10 Oct 14 by member: Ms Elizabeth
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Bad Dilbert cartoon... yep! My (new) coworker pushed so hard to wear jeans on Fridays that the boss finally gave in, just for today, because we have no appointments. She's all excited. I don't get it. Would much rather wear my baggy dress pants than be constricted in jeans. Wore some plaid but casual pants today and she's all mad I didn't wear jeans. It's bad enough around here without people pushing denim on me! The only pair of jeans I have are adorned with the pre-made holes. Yeah, not appropriate. Whatever. I commend your resolve for working out after what sounds like one heck of a day! Maybe say something to your sitter like, "you know, Squirt and I had a rough day, he was SO hungry. . . " just so she can see her actions have consequences that affect you.
10 Oct 14 by member: megmonster
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I think I once wrapped all of my desk stuff individually in tin foil - stapler, tape dispenser, etc., and when coworkers asked why I'd go 'because of the ... oh, you haven't been briefed... forget I said anything...' Created a mild panic as well as kept people out of my cube for the day... some for the rest of the time I worked there. You may have it. You're welcome.
10 Oct 14 by member: FullaBella
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I have a little orange cone on my desk (a replica of the cones the road construction workers place on the roads) that says, "You can't fix stupid!" For some reason I lost a lot of the traffic to my office. Maybe there's more of that going around than I thought, or they thought I was referring to them. Ya think?
10 Oct 14 by member: DairyKing
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you really should consider putting ur fs blogs into a book. u have a gift for telling the fun part of mommahood.
10 Oct 14 by member: maiewa
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Cubes, cubes, cubes... drive you nuts!!! Hope your next week goes better. Seems to have an affect on everyone and the bosses, everyone needs to be the same and fit into the little cube profile. I don't fit, I grew up in the suburbs, then lived in the country for 20+ years. My dept. You should be from the inner city, I have no idea even what they are saying, I do not understand the language. 2 of us on our team are in the same boat. I understand affluent corporate America and red-neck Missouri. Dang what a combination!! Thankful I have a new unit manger who doesn't understand them either. I really like her.
10 Oct 14 by member: wholefoodnut
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