Start Weight:(25 Aug 12) 285.0 lb
Current Weight:(20 Aug 14) 190.0 lb
Goal Weight:180.0 lb
following: Make Peace with Myself
performance: Steady

Having battled weight issues my whole life I can say I am GREAT at losing weight. But I am horrible at keeping it off.

This will be my fifth attempt to lose a massive amount of weight and keep it off. The first was 50lbs when I was 13; 80lbs in my 20's; 100+ in my 30's (seeing a pattern here?) and 100+ lbs in my 40's.

All of these losses had the same common denominators: 1) too fast 2) starvation 3) appetite suppressants 4) binge & purge and 5) the weight came back when I couldn't deprive myself anymore or forgot my 'never again' announcement because 6) I had not fixed the problem (eating disorder) just the symptom (weight).

This time, I'm taking it slow on purpose. I'm eating more but better. I may only lose a couple of pounds a month as I use this time to take care of the emotional drama that has accompanied the weight regain in the past.

I'm older and should be smarter. I need to prove it and settle this for the last time. I am going to heal my body as I heal my life.

A few of my favorite daily mantras:

I'm not losing weight. I'm converting Fat to Muscle to be healthier.
When I am hungry, I will eat what I love. When I am bored, I will do something I love. When I am lonely, I will call someone I love. When I am sad, I will remember I am loved.
Food IS my friend I just have to choose my friends wisely.
I can HAVE any food I WANT but I find the longer I eat HEALTHY I only WANT healthy foods.
My entire life is an All You Can Eat Buffet. What will I choose today?
Just because a little is good for you doesn't mean a whole lot more is better.
One day, one moment, one bite at a time. It all adds up.

FatSecret member since: 17 Oct 12

FullaBella's Weight History

FullaBella's Latest Member Challenges

  No Excuses Fitness Challenge - 75 in 31
status: Completed
ended: 05 Aug 14
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  Meditate for Stress Reduction
status: Completed
ended: 24 Mar 14
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FullaBella's Buddies

Online now Deb_N
last weighin: losing 0.5 lb a week Down
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last weighin: losing 2.0 lb a week Down
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FullaBella's Latest Posts

Sharing for Comments and Thoughts
I know.. I was conflicted this morning when I saw it.. my first reaction was 'great... let's create disordered eating young in life by making the kid want the sugar/dessert more than their actual 'food'.

But then thought about it thru the day. On the one hand.. how many babies have we fed making the propeller sound while saying 'open up the hanger.. here comes the plane' or 'choo choo'...

I'm wondering if the kid actually recognizes candy or just 'look.. it's red.. something different. I know I didn't like that stuff on the spoon.. what's this brown shaped thing in their fingers? After all.. I eat with my fingers.. '

I guess it's like anything else.. we all watch the same video and attach different conclusions and our own emotions.
posted 27 Aug 2014, 21:25
Sharing for Comments and Thoughts
posted 27 Aug 2014, 10:20

posted 25 Aug 2014, 21:36
low calorie snack/food
I hate it when I come in after the movie starts.
posted 21 Aug 2014, 14:33
Finding a Chocolate Truffle in the Rain by Geneen Roth
corifeo wrote:
FullaBella wrote:
corifeo wrote:
men in my family are shamed by both men and women if we are lazy or not effective provider. This is a negative pressure but it does have the positive result of making us very hard working.

I'm curious - and I'm not saying this is within your family; but what if the shame is so deep that the men result to illegal work just to be the provider. I guess I'm asking if in your family.. or by that logic .. does the end justify the means?

All I could think of was the sopranos when reading this… haha my family is boring and normal. But all action we take have some unintended consequence.

LOL - ironic but that's along the lines I was thinking too.. one of those 'I do these things for the family rather than endure shame of not having a job' and was having a subliminal thought about the correlation between peer pressure that leads to eating disorders among so many .. anything than to endure the shame of being overweight.
posted 20 Aug 2014, 10:48
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FullaBella's journal

27 August 2014

I'm considering pasting this out in the forums and getting a discussion going.. what do y'all think?

26 August 2014

Such nice things you all commented on my anniversary journal yesterday. Thank you. I am truly blessed. I have wonderful, supportive, encouraging friends. ...

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Welcome to "THE MOB". This group is for people who are Morbidly Obese who need support from other people who get it!

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This is for fun. Silver Fox was a fun challenge but anyone is welcome. Geared for women.

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