It's a GORGEOUS day in Roskilde, Denmark.
The sun is shining, my window is open and I can hear the birds singing outside. What an awesome way to spend the morning.
I am, of course, still in the hospital, but I am honestly feeling generally good.
I am out of bed, got my little laptop out and I am enjoying some rye bread with cheese, a yoghurt and a cup of coffee. Honesly, I could do this every day if it wasn't for the few post-surgery details. :)
This is my view looking out the window - nice, huh?
What you can see in the picture is Roskilde Domkirke (Roskilde Cathedral). It's an amazing church, with a LOT of history. We have most of our kings and queens buried there, and it's an amazing place to tour. If you're ever in Denmark, make sure you don't miss it.
For your convenience, here is a little history on it.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roskilde_CathedralSo, how am I feeling, you ask? I'm actually feeling pretty good. They took out the catheter, so now I have to go pee on my own. Oh, the inconvenience! :) I'm joking, of course. It's nice to not have any tubes dangling that I can get messed up. I am still wearing a really tight belt, which I think I will be wearing for a while, to support my stomach and the stitches. It's sort of inconvenient and tedious, but it's no biggie.
I do feel - mostly when I get up or make larger movements, that my wound is oozing a little. It gets warm and most, especially from the back. They ensure me that this is perfectly normal and nothing to worry about. It just feels really weird, and it always makes me think that something is not right. But as the nurse just explained to me, the body will do this and it now as to find a new opening to squeeze it out, and it's better that it does it now than that they have to drain it after the wounds are completely closed. I guess that makes sense.
Sometimes it's nice to have things put in perspective.
Sleep? I haven't had a whole lot. I went to bed around midnight, since I slept most of the day yesterday, and I woke up at 3 AM, as I do every so often. Of course, today there was no exercise bike waiting for me, so all I could do was lie in bed. I spent my time listening to a couple of cool blues CDs, and messing around on Facebook on my phone. At around 5 AM or so I feel asleep and slept tight until about thirty minutes ago, around 8:30 AM, when the nurse brought breakfast.
So, yesterday they mentioned that I might go home today. I'm not sure I'm quite there yet, but we'll see what the doctors say. If I was to choose, I would stay an extra day just to make sure everything is fine, but I know they don't work like that. The moment you can be on your own and it's safe, then that's what you'll be doing. That's okay.
My concern is the oozing. I'm not sure how to handle it, and I'm not sure how to clean it up.
I have gotten the getting-out-of-bed and the sitting-down and getting-up down pretty well. It's not too hard. I have to focus on NOT bending too much on neither front or back. It's a little tricky, and I don't always succeed, but I think I'm doing okay. They haven't come after me and told me that I am sitting wrong or anything, so that's pretty good. I try to be very aware of tension in my stitches, especially on my back where they are a little more critical when I sit down. It's basically a matter of doing everything with my back straight, take it easy and really feel how the skin stretches. ...and then of course avoid strain on it.
It's a little difficult to determine the stretch. I don't feel the stitches much. I wonder if that is because the nerves have been cut? I think someone wrote something about that in a comment here one day? Something about that it would be surprisingly pain free to have this surgery. Regardless if I read it or if I am making it up, I will have to agree. I had expected a LOT more pain than what I have had so far.
As a matter of fact, I was talking to Wife about this on the phone yesterday. Some of you may remember that I got a kick in the butt from a tedious food poisoning a few weeks ago. It was bad. Really bad. Anyways, I was telling Wife yesterday that this surger actually has been a lot easier on me than the food poisoning. There has not been any severe pains, just a little drowziness and dizziness, but nothing that I couldn't handle one way or the other. No pains, which is what I was the most scared of.
I still haven't had a proper look at my new, hot body. It's always wrapped up with my supporting belt, so I can't really see it. I don't feel any different, but that is probably also because the belt is tight and I feel the pressure from it. I can't feel my stomach as I normally would without the belt.
Of course, there is also the fact that I don't know how it's supposed to feel. I have never NOT had a belly. I wonder what it's like.
Wow. That's an odd question, isn't it? :) There has been so many wild experiences and questions through this weight loss journey, and I have learnt so many things. It's crazy, and it's so weird to think that I am essentially done, other than maintenance and doing right.
Sometimes it scares me, the maintenance.
It freaks me out that I need to always be alert when it comes to my weight. I know, I have all the tools, I have all the knowledge, and I even have developed my own techniques that I'm gonna pass on to others, but it STILL freaks me out.
I don't want to lose grip on all this. I want to stay slim and fit, especially since the surgery has been done.
I guess it's simply a matter of getting on the scale on a regular basis and go from there. I have considered getting back to weighing myself daily, to keep it in a shorter leash. Especially after the freak-out the other day. I don't want to be that high. Sunday morning was a little high again, compared to my weigh-in Friday. I'm very curious about what I weight now, after being in the hospital for a few days.
My meals have been pretty small. It seems that when they asked me, Monday after surgery, what I wanted to eat, I just asked for a little bit of dinner. Then, yesterday I was still not feeling too awesome in the morning, so I just asked for a little bread and cheese and a yoghurt. It seems that they registered this as my choice of breakfast and dinner. Probably the same with lunch. They're small, but good meals. I don't really need more, and the quality of the food is absolutely decent. I've enjoyed the meals so far.
I have absolutely no urge for snacks. The only "bad" thing I have had was a chocolate dessert after dinner yesterday, and two little Dansk cookies. Nothing much, and nothing that would amount to any "real" calories compared to the low intake of the last few days.
It's gonna be interesting to get on the scale at home, when I get there.
I was pondering a little on this yesterday. My weight has mostly been 78-79 kgs, much to my frustration, as I really wanted to be below 77. 77 was the weight I was supposed to be to qualify for surgery, and I made that goal, but 77 is also the upper range for normal weight if we look at a BMI of 25. I know, BMI is a bull system, but still. It's a guide line.
Now, after they have removed 2.6 kgs of excess skin, I should technically be around 75-76 all the time, right? :) Maybe that would simply fit it?
Now, there will of course soon be another weight gain. Muscle. I hope to get moving more after I have recovered from the surgery and I get permission to start moving.
My plan is simply to start up the exercise DVDs again, and start moving more. Wife has mentioned that she'd like to start running, and I'm gonna see if I can hold her to it, so I have a running partner. I think Daughter might like to join too.
So first goal is to get a little more fit.
Second goal will be to start lifting some weights, and get some strenght training. I want a little more muscle in my arms, they are skinny and I have "bat wings", and I think it would look nice to have it all a little more beefy.
I still feel that my upper body looks a little too "creepy skinny", and I would like to tone it just a little.
I don't see myself with a six pack or anything like that, just me in good shape. That will give me something to do, training, and it will help me control my calories. I think it'll be good for me. The big question is of course if I can continue doing it. Exercise was never my forté, and even if I have done A LOT more than I ever expected, it's still something that I find tedious. A regular schedule at a gym may be asking A LOT from me.
I guess we'll see how it goes.
today, I am thankful for:
- Feeling so much better, and feeling that I am recovering.
- No pains.
- Being out of bed and able to use my laptop.
- Morning coffe (Salute!)
- An open window and the smell of summer outside.
Life is good!
