Penlan's Journal, 27 November 2016

I am so sorry you have lost your dear sister in law. Prayers of comfort being said for you.  

Sorry for your loss. I can understand that you are still hurting, it has only been 3 weeks. In time you will start to feel less hurt. On the other hand you do seem fairly positive, but don't push yourself too much! Take things nice and steady and i am sure with support you will do well. 

My condolences. It is amazing how often just knowing what is wrong with you starts the road to recovery. You have my best wishes. 

I'm sorry to hear about your sad loss. I hope knowing what has been ailing you will indeed help, and also that regaining your health will help you overcome other difficulties. You are a strong person, and you will have support here. Take care! 

Big 'Ugs. You've been right through the mangle, haven't you? I'm guessing you SiL was a support to you as well which will make losing her even more traumatic. Also, being so close in age brings a feeling of mortality that sets a coldness in your bones. Stay strong and lean on us if you need to. You know where I am x 

I'm so sorry, Penlan. Big internet hugs for you and nothing I can type in text can adequately say condolences, but I hope you know I mean them all the same. Those emotionally challenging moments can definitely put pressure on all those good routines/habits that we cultivate in calmer times. I think you're right that standing back and looking at a situation objectively is helpful, particularly when the emotions are running high, it can be fuel for self-sabotage. But it doesn't have to be. As much as you can, try to remember that you can soothe and comfort yourself in positive and beneficial ways, bearing in mind those better habits; go for a walk, make a nice cup of tea or whatever you fancy, reflect on the good times, be grateful for them, celebrate all that was wonderful about your friendship with this person, and raise a toast to them. Know that they would not want you to suffer, that they would want you to be well. Know that your body is your living vehicle, your companion in life, and to treat it with compassion and inclusion in the process of healing and dealing, as it were. I don't know if any of this helps a bit, but...well, I hope it does. I've been there, over different situations, but..yeah, I know it can be hard. xox  

Take care and be good Penn x 

Your body is working hard to get you through a traumatic time. The healing process is starting and don't feel guilty about doing the things that make you feel happy, Your SIS would want you to You have set yourself a challenge which is amazing and this will help you manage your day and cope with those feelings of loss. There are some magnificent comments here. I'm sure you have understood the deeper meanings that have been conveyed to you at this time. Hugs to you. Look after yourself and try to take some time out just for you x🌹🌹🌹 

I reiterate everything that has been said here. My best wishes to you and your family, you are being very strong and pragmatic in the circumstances. One step at a time, we're always here. 

I have only just seen all these wonderful messages of support and hope for me. Thanks so much you all, it is a great strength and comfort to me in these difficult times. I am so glad to be back in the FS community, I hope to be engaged more now, as I find time and strength. I certainly want to get back on track, and I really do appreciate you being there. I hope I can offer help to you some time if you need it, or maybe raise a laugh or even a wry smile to you some time. Thanks buddies, you are all fab! Xx 

Ditto to everyone else`s comments. A diagnosis, though distressing, can also be a positive. You know we are here.