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Six months and 6 days ago the journey to improving my health began. If you ask Bella and I, the end of August is a great time to start losing weight and changing your health! Forget that New Year's resolution!
In the past six months, I have lost 47 pounds. I have shrunk 18 inches since I started measuring my self about 3 months into my journey. I am down 5 pants sizes and I am nearly ready to go down another size. My fashionista 15-year-old told me that my "skinny" jeans were baggy. I am giving myself another week or 2 - I still have a pair of goal pants to get into before I make another leap. Thank God for second hand and consignment clothing stores!
My co-workers have been great. They risk that dreaded HR faux pas by telling me that I am "looking good". My family has also been extremely supportive. When I talk of my latest milestone, my teenagers don't even roll their eyes. The last hold out was my 20 something son who finally caved and told me that working out was working for me.
Speaking of working out - I am back on the daily workout bandwagon starting tomorrow. I like the way it makes me feel. I never thought I would say that. Exercise is something that used to cause pain and I avoided it. But working out every day really helps me with stress and gives me that satisfaction that, for once, I am doing something for me. Wholly and solely for me.
It has been fantastic to have the support from friends, co-workers, and family. It has been a blessing to find this site, use it every day, and find the extremely motivational and supportive people here. I really needed it.
I think the biggest change in the past six months has been me. I hid behind my weight, using it as a defense and using it to keep people away. I didn't want anyone to know how miserable I was. It is easy when you are obese - people will actually go out of their way to avoid you. But, it is a costly state of existence. It helped keep my pain hidden, but it disn't solve a damned thing. And it trashed my health.
I now eat with a conscious mind rather than mindless consumption without regard for flavor, nutrional benefit, or caloric content. Even eating out is OK, I think I have crossed over. I save things like nachos and stuff for home so that I can use lower fat and calorie products to make the things I enjoy. My daily salad now has people at work shaking their head saying, "you and your vegetables!" There are so many things that are much worse to be known for!
I think the biggest challenge I still have is the premise of, "food is my friend that I turn to when things aren't going my way." Emotional eating is difficult for me to change - I have used it for decades justifying the indulgence in food I don't need by telling myself that I deserve it. Quite a tale of self sabotage!
I really deserve to be healthy and fit. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to be proud of my accomplishments both personally and professionally. I deserve to be proud of the people in my life - they are each on their own personal journey and I need to celebrate when our paths overlap and we get to walk together and share. Most of all I deserve to be satisfied. Satisfied with my weight, my appearance, my demeanor, and my life.
Happy March everyone! Spring is nearly here!
Diet Calendar Entries for 02 March 2013:
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1620 kcal
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Fat: 42.70g | Prot: 74.87g | Carb: 233.00g.
Breakfast: sargento 2% mexican cheese, country style hash browns, Flavors French Vanilla Ground Coffee, stevia, Milk (Nonfat). Lunch: panda express kung pao chicken, panda express mushroom chicken, panda express steamed vegetables. Dinner: Taco Bell fresco bean burrito. Snacks/Other: Baskin Robbins fat free yogurt. more...
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3177 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Desk Work - 3 hours, Housework - 2 hours, Driving - 3 hours, Shopping - 4 hours, Resting - 7 hours, Sleeping - 5 hours. more...
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