adefwebserver's Journal, 19 November 2018

Day 1 of a planned 2 day β€˜no solid food’ fast
Blood sugar 109 mg/dL

23 pushups (2019 PUSH UP Challenge!)

So 175lbs is *not* where I want to be right now, especially right before Thanksgiving when I plan to *gain* more weight.

But, πŸ‘ΆπŸΎ self-control is something that I just don't have, and I gave up trying. Let me tell you I am WAY happier πŸ‘πŸΎ. Being constantly angry at myself and depressed is not only harmful to myself, family and friends, it is egotistical and selfish.

I have no self control, πŸ§˜πŸΎβ€β™‚οΈ I accept this.

So, I do what I CAN do. It's Monday, back on the 'no solid food fast' and πŸƒπŸΎ running and continue to πŸ‹πŸΎ lift weights :)

πŸ“ˆ This week I will take a *major hit* because I won't be able to do my normal 5 day 'no solid food' fast. Starting Wednesday I have a day of cooking with my Mother. I'm going to surrender to whatever she wants to do that day and be grateful we have this time together. On my deathbed how much money I have and what I weigh will not matter, but my family and friends will. NOTHING else will matter, period.

πŸ“… It's gonna take weeks to get back down to the 160s that I am comfortable with. There are worse things in life than the ability to have such wealth in family, friends, and money that I can feast for a week :)

πŸƒπŸΎ Anyway, I am off for a run...

😎 Life is Good! Have a great day everyone!
175.0 lb Lost so far: 32.0 lb.    Still to go: 11.0 lb.    Diet followed poorly.

Diet Calendar Entries for 19 November 2018:
900 kcal Fat: 21.50g | Prot: 148.00g | Carb: 22.00g.   Breakfast: Land O'Lakes Heavy Whipping Cream, Quest Vanilla Milkshake Protein Powder. Dinner: Land O'Lakes Heavy Whipping Cream, Quest Vanilla Milkshake Protein Powder. Snacks/Other: Quest Vanilla Milkshake Protein Powder, Quest Vanilla Milkshake Protein Powder, Muscle Milk Light Vanilla Creme Protein Shake (17 oz). more...
2309 kcal Activities & Exercise: Running - 6/mph - 30 minutes, Resting - 15 hours and 30 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
on diet adefwebserver's own diet   gaining 7.0 lb a week

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Comments 
good way to look at things, family and health are most important. You will be just fine once the Holidays are over. You know how to be strict when the need is there. I think this will be your true bulking time. plenty of fuel to work off! 
19 Nov 18 by member: baskington
@Baskington - Thanks! I think that my muscle bulking is part of the weight gain. I have been easily lifting 200lbs and I have lifted weights 3 of the past 4 days. But, staying up late and eating tacos, then deciding to have fried chicken last night is adding a lot of carbs and that always makes me gain weight :)  
19 Nov 18 by member: adefwebserver
Well said adef! I've been stressing out over Thanksgiving because it's on Thursday and my regular weigh in is Fri. I even tried to get family to float it til Fri with excuse I work til 3 and off on Fridays but it was really because of the weigh in thing. I'm going to take to heart what you said because it is so true . We can get back on track and lose but the memories made with family are priceless. I'm tired of stressing over every little gain. I need to focus on how far I've come and know that I am strong enough and one day will not undo my whole diet because it's become a WOE and not just a diet anymore  
19 Nov 18 by member: LTHOMP56
yes this is all part of it, you will not be able to go to what you thought was your ideal weight because you have added muscle weight as you dropped that fat. I am excited for you and hope you can mentally wrap your head around focusing more on physical improvements instead of weight loss. with your fasting routine and limited carbs on non holiday weeks you will never let yourself get fat again. You got this! 
19 Nov 18 by member: baskington
You COULD have self control - you CHOOSE not to control yourself - but that is okay because you found a work-around for that! Now, relax and just enjoy the holiday - have a great time hanging out in the kitchen with your mom and enjoy what she makes for you - I envy you having a mother who cares enough to do things like that :) 
19 Nov 18 by member: nikeit
Do you think you could come up with a work-around for me so I don't have to exercise? That would be awesome! Have a great Thanksgiving!! 
19 Nov 18 by member: nikeit
@Nikeit - I could control myself for a day or two, but for multiple days, evidence has shown that I just can't do it :( I never wanted to be obese all my adult life, I just didn't know how to work around my limitations. 
19 Nov 18 by member: adefwebserver
Is it just me, or is 23 pushups for a challenge named for a year that is six weeks away ridiculous??? 
19 Nov 18 by member: jengetfit123
@jengetfit123 - I am planning to increase 1 pushup a day... this is gonna get REAL difficult in two weeks :) :) 
19 Nov 18 by member: adefwebserver
@nikeit - The workaround for *not exercising* is <10 carbs a day and <900 calories.... and NO Cheat Days :)  
19 Nov 18 by member: adefwebserver
Gonna? I mean, you are kinda underselling yourself, imo.  
19 Nov 18 by member: jengetfit123
@jengetfit123 - You mean the pushups? In three weeks I have to do nearly 50 without stopping. By week 8 I will have to do 80! :) But, I will 'try' :) 
19 Nov 18 by member: adefwebserver
What i mean is 23 seems like a lot to me! 80 seems superhuman. 
19 Nov 18 by member: jengetfit123
I don't think I really like that little work around - I guess it's back to that old exercise for me :) 
19 Nov 18 by member: nikeit
Enjoy your Thanksgiving dinner with you mother, I don't have one 😭. I am worried about weight gain too, So, I didn't brought the scale 😜 
19 Nov 18 by member: Keilin_4
We are going after the same thing lol Need to lose as much as possible before Wednesday! I’ll be having lots of treats staring Wednesday 😬  
19 Nov 18 by member: CrashtestDawnie
@CrashtestDawnie - I did good today. Let's see if I drop a pound :) 
19 Nov 18 by member: adefwebserver
learning how to eat safely is a challenge, I do think in time you can learn, you already know some of your triggers, it is all about avoiding those triggers which cause the cravings for you. gosh knows it is trial and error. 
20 Nov 18 by member: baskington

     
 

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