houndish's Journal, 30 October 2018

Can you be the driver? Good excuse not to drink. We shouldn't have to make excuses but That should stop the nagging x 

Stop being a hermit. The last time someone gave me that line I told them, "Yes, it would kill me." Didn't explain any further, just smiled. Then ordered my San Pellegrino. Had a great time talking with friends and it helped keep me away from all the food. Or I plan for a few items and track them. Get out there and enjoy your life. Food and alcohol don't define you. 

"Doctor's orders" can be a useful phrase.  

Sparkling water with lime. Or, if you must, Michelob Ultra.  

It's your body, your health. OWN IT 

On the rare cases where I do have a drink I limit it to one and usually go with a Yeungling Light. Less than 100 calories. If you nurse it then it looks like you always have a drink in your hand and you will be less likely to be harassed about getting another drink. In the case of parties I make sure I go easy on the calories throughout the day and allow for the extra from the party food.  

I drink club soda or a single glass of wine. Don't be a hermit. If you're not getting what you need from social interaction, change your social interactions.  

I am a hermit and an introvert. I have found that i often was most interested in the food and drink at social gatherings, and tbh without them i have to work a lot harder to be social than i care to oftentimes. If you like the social interaction, focus more on that. (The movie, the people, the cammaraderie, etc. Play a game where you vow to talk to two new people, or find out something new about ppl you know well. Then focus on that.) Presumably your friends and co-workers and loved ones want to interact with you, and not just watch you eat. If they have some problem with you abstaining, or limiting what you eat and drink, that is their problem, not yours!  

Also, i often think of this: personally, i have always hated ham. It is not a religious thing, i just really dislike it. So i never, ever have any problem telling ppl i don't eat it. And maybe i have offended lots of ppl or ruined their social gatherings over the years, but i don't care bc i can't stand it and won't eat it. So now if there is simething not on my woe that someone wants me to eat, even to try just a taste, i just pretend it is ham. Your mileage may vary. 

You have to get a thicker skin, which will come with getting lighter and healthier. My BFF has lost 70 pounds and just says "no, I can't afford to drink my calories" and always orders salad with dressing on the side and a portion of meat. I love the contradancing and square dancing that I do because all of the social events are alcohol-free. You can't keep up with the dance and drink so no one does. Once you refuse for real, and still hang out and have fun, most people will adjust. It's the people who know they have a problem with alcohol who are usually the worst offenders. Good luck - being healthy shouldn't be a punishment. 

I love to socialize. I enjoy eating out and the occasional adult beverage. I usually alternate a cocktail with diet soda -- that way I have a drink in hand, but it's not caloric. I don't enjoy the feeling of being drunk, so that's a self-limiter right there. It was hard at first to go to a movie and not get popcorn and candy, but now I create a goal of a nice meal right afterward (and I have a light snack before I go) so that it's easier and more motivating NOT to eat the popcorn. When I go out with friends, it seems that a lot of the happy hour items are fattening or not on my diet plan, so I choose to spend a little more money to get exactly what I want. I help my friends choose restaurants were I'd like to eat: sushi is something we all like. The flash pizza places are also good: they have salads, veggie toppings for the pizzas, etc. The one we like has a wall of beer on tap -- they give you a card and you tap your own. If you're trying to restrict your serving, that would be a good choice, as you could tap 4 ounces, drink it, drink a diet drink, then go back and tap 4 ounces of something else -- fresh cold beer every time! 

i used to have a dinner i would go to every week with friends. i was trying to keep my weight down and i was poor so most times i would order a coffee and water and just enjoying chatting 

I use many of SoCalPam advice. Eat before you go. Always keep a drink in your hand. Say no. I have been questioned by friends who know I'm trying to care for my health, but still push the alcohol. I think it's different when you go to a sports bar to watch a game. Drinking and eating is expected and encouraged. Don't look at it like it's an either/or situation. Your friends are trying to recreate former good times. So, it's okay to have a good time, but in a different way. Do whatever works for you in order to stick to your plan and have a good time with friends. Use this as an opportunity to get creative with your problem solving skills. Low calorie beer and dry wings are usually on the menu. You can handle this your way and still socialize. Good luck.👍