newduggan's Journal, 01 June 2021

Today, I don’t want to get on the scale, because of the weight I’ve gained. I hate encouraging words (much like DP, Girl I get you) when I’ve done my self in. This has been a life long battle, and I know when and why it started, but can’t seem to grab ahold of it when I’m feeling my worst! It’s like a serious drug problem, but eating! And, to top it all off, I’ve gone ahead and made a business, literally, out of my bad choices! I own a bakery business, and am around temptation all the time! 🤦🏻‍♀️. Today marks day one of giving an F about my self, and I’m RE starting this thing all over again! I’m going to mark my weight daily, which I avoid doing when I’ve gained weight, because I am ashamed to look at it, and see the regression! 12 (ish) lbs up, and I’m totally ashamed of my self! But On here, I’m going to be accountable, starting tomorrow I’ll renter my weight daily, and really be accountable! 

Oh Girl! You just described me to a tee. Although I do not own a bakery, I do love to bake. I avoid the scales because I hate how much I’ve gained. Like you, I have restarted this endeavor just last week. I do have a weakness for pastries and hate myself when I indulge. But I start again the next day and try to do a better job. I have found that a lot of my overeating is in the evening. Usually boredom eating or seeing something on the tv that “sounds” goods. That is my trigger. FS helps in that I have to account for every calorie and I can remind myself that I have consumed my daily calorie intake. I wish you the very best of luck as you get back on that horse! We are women and we can do anything we set our minds to do! 

Yup, keeping yourself accountable works. I wish only good things for you. 

I feel ya. 

I'm glad you are here with us. Love your cute smile.  

but your still gorgeous and your man adores you. and you recognize it. so many just go through life and blame everyone else. I admire you 2. your a blessing.  

👋ND...that's mindfulness🤙 

Fuck it. I weigh daily. I don't love it. I'm embarrassed by it sometimes, truth be told. I hate the oohs and ahs when I gain and lose 4-5 pounds (of sodium and water) but I want to do it for me. We are very alike but you are a much better baker. 😉 💪🏼 ❤️ 

You look great. Love your smile and eyes. And love the tray of food to.  

One thing I've learned is to not watch the spring baking championship show when I'm hungry. 😆 Great pic, too, but the way! 🔥 

Thanks all! Gentleman, you’re too kind. I’m not so good at sharing what I feel, and I’m realizing that there are a lot of things I didn’t know of my self! But I’m done trudging through a foggy haze of Bull shit I tell my self! David’s Princess, I admire you! And I’m gonna hop on a scale, publicly tonight! 😭🥺 

Having an eating disorder is harder to manage than another addiction. Normal addictions have something to do with something you don’t need to survive. We can’t do without food, we have to learn to manage it 🙁 

Being honest is your ticket to success. A lot of us here have felt the same way, but never voice it. When I lost the first time, my emotions and mood for the day were dictated by what number came up on the scale that morning. I felt so immature and out of control. I had to tell myself constantly, "you're an intelligent woman, you can do this". I got within 10 pounds of goal weight and gave up, gained 90% of what I lost and even left FS. I came back end of last year and have lost a grand total of 6 

Sorry, hit post by accident. lost about 6 pounds so far. So, what I'm saying is I admire and appreciate your honesty. ❤ You are an intelligent woman and will figure out what you have to work on and what you need to do and how to do it in order to achieve your goals. ❤👍 

Thanks for sharing. I’m there with you, it’s an everyday struggle. Some days better than others. Huggs. 

Thank you for sharing. I'm currently recovering from binge eating disorder, too. I have to exercise plenty and keep my TDEE up because I know I'm still addicted to food, not going to reduce how much I'm eating overnight unless I want to lose my mind, but want to lose weight. I also have to make diet changes very slowly so I don't lose my mind, and I'm amazed when "normal" people can make changes overnight and still function. It's tough! Hugs! 

I have to weigh daily to face reality too. If I don’t it’s easy to pretend everything is fine while the pounds add on. 

Beautiful lady, smile, & capture... Everyone here has some sort of habit we're struggling to get over, but it's testimonies like yours and many others that help, many that feel they're alone realize that they're not...Thanks! so much for sharing with us. I pray God bless, keep, and help you to over-come your dis-order and grant you your desires, in the name Jesus Christ. Take care. 

I've suffered from this since the age of 12 it so hard to keep a balance. you look beautiful 

Great smile!