biketolive's Journal, 01 November 2018

Hi FS Friends,
I am back from a month-long binge. The attached photo was Sept 22, exactly 3 months into my Keto journey and 239. At that 50th Birthday Party I indulged in a piece of birthday cake that had a mile thick icing blanket. It was an outdoor/night/bonfire type thing so if I'm totally honest I think I had the cake because my brain told me it was under the cover of darkness and no-one would see me eating it, and I would somehow get away with it. I did not get away with it. Good God!!! For one month straight I became old me, McDonald's, Wendys, Starbucks, etc etc... I was still doing a Keto lunch, but "allowed" myself a stop at any of these fast food places on the way home from work (8-9pm) 3 or 4 nights a week. A month disappeared in the blink of an eye. Finally on Oct 22, with gentle encouragement from the most fit man I know, my husband, I was able to come back to reality and focus on what I really want, and that is to mirror his health. When I got on the scale on Oct 22 I was pleasantly surprised to see 245 from 239 Sept 22, it was my first time on the scale, as i was in full denial. The next day and first full day of Keto it was 242, yesterday 239 and today 238. BACK ON TRACK. I am not currently weighing my food, or really thinking about portion too much, I know I am eating too much cheese and nuts, I even made some fat bombs, but I AM NOT EATING SUGAR. Lunches still consist of Avocado, Smoked Salmon, Bacon, Nuts, Cheese, Eggs, and dinners are a Big Salad with Tomato/Cucumber/Mushroom, Nuts (pistachios/macadamia), and Cheese (Goat and Blue Crumbles). Here it is: Get healthy to lose weight, not the other way around. I've thought of you guys in the last 5 weeks, and the resilience and determination you all have, and I was looking forward to this day, the day that my focus would be back and that I could confidently sit in your space again. It was scary being adrift. I pray episodes like that get less and less. This is the fastest I have ever returned to the light in all my 4 years. I respect every single one of you - this is not an easy path.