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The squishing is done for now. The additional views on the mammo flattened out whatever it was they saw but still ... got an ultrasound to boot. They "think" everything is fine but want me back in 6 months for another ultrasound. Apparently I have some scenic scar tissue they want to keep an eye on and make sure it doesn't "change."
In the middle of my mammo my cell phone rings. It is my husband. My father-in-law was on his way to the hospital with heart problems. He was transported to our local hospital who did the best they could to stablize him but his heart rate kept dropping ... so they transported him to a larger hospital with a heart unit about an hour away. No news yet. Bob was on his way there and will call me with updates once he knows something. My father-in-law's common-law "wife" was in a tizzie. My husand told her to "suck it up" that he couldn't deal with her and him at the same time. I guess she calmed down. She's upset that no one will listen to her because she is not legally his wife. It is true. She is on oxygen 24-7 and only has 4 hours of oxygen that is portable so cannot go to the hospital in Coeur d' Alene. Besides which my husband does not need to be carting her around while he tries to look after his dad and get his own cancer treatment. Those of you who follow my journal know a little about our feelings about my father-in-law's "wife" ... she is not a "decent" human being. Fortunately I remembered that one of the women who works in my building, her daughter lives with the pseudo mother-in-law's grandson. Gratefully she called the grandson (and I got his number) and HE can look in on his grandmother, run her errands, calm her down. Right now ... at this moment ... I'm afraid I cannot be nice, sweet, and supportive to the old bat. I'm sorry if that sounds awful ... if you knew the whole story you might understand I am not really a cold-hearted b****.
Perhaps needless to say ... I'm a tad overwhelmed this moment. I need to pull myself back together, breathe, whatever it is will be and it will be fine. I do fairly well with dealing with stress ... however right now I am full up.
Okay ... I should try to concentrate on something work related. Either that or go to a local pub and drink until I am numb. Nah ... I don't like hangovers and sure don't need a DUI. LOL!!
Diet Calendar Entries for 10 February 2010:
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1528 kcal
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Fat: 19.86g | Prot: 80.19g | Carb: 215.32g.
Breakfast: McDougall's Peach Raspberry Oatmeal, water, Fiber One. Lunch: Hidden Valley Ranch Fat Free Dressing, baby carrots, Blue Bunny Light Yogurt, apple. Dinner: Lean Cuisine Garlic Ginger Chicken. Snacks/Other: vodka, Snickers Marathon Dark Chocolate Crunch. more...
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2691 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Standing - 1 hour, Pilates - 50 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours, Resting - 4 hours and 10 minutes, Desk Work - 7 hours, Driving - 3 hours. more...
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 Comments
No one could think you are a cold hearted anything. We all have our breaking point and certain people that we just do not care for. I don't think there is anything wrong with that. I hope you will have some relief soon in the stress department. I am sending lots of loving vibes and stress reduction your way!
10 Feb 10 by member: dawn0001
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Yes, I concur. We women sometimes "over extend " our niceness ~ and even then, it's never enough. You know what's best for you and your family. Stay well, and take time for yourself. That "ole stress" is a killer, so definitely take time to "......breathe.......
:)
10 Feb 10 by member: RedGoddess
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Heya! I'm sorry to hear about the medical problems, and for both you and your father-in-law at once is really rough deal. I hope your family pulls through together and well. I am glad to hear that your mammogram didn't show anything. That is certainly good news. I hope your father-in-law recovers!
10 Feb 10 by member: wintersmith
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moose: I'm glad to hear that the mammogram is evidently OK and am surprised to hear that besides the ultrasound they didn't throw in a CAT scan and an MRI to boot, just to be *absolutely* sure that *everything* is ok. ;-) I'm very sorry and alarmed to hear about your Father-in-Law and certainly hope they are able to stabilize the situation in time. I also feel bad for your husband who has more than enough on his mind and hands at the moment. Insofar as the Mother-in-Law is concerned, unfortunately, I have been around long enough and have seen so many "situations" that I understand your feelings only *too* well. I almost wish that I didn't (and suspect that others may not). Having said that, watch yourself and your words very closely moose: "These are the times that try men's souls." Good Luck buddy!
10 Feb 10 by member: information
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Moose, I'm so sorry for your father in law... you husband doesn't need this, neither do you...your feelings about "her" are certainly legitimate, and you don't have to justify them. I keep you in my thoughts. take a deep breath... it will be ok.
10 Feb 10 by member: jessyline
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Moose, I will be praying that you are able to get through this and support your husband without killing your "mother in law." I know you well enough to know that you must have very good reasons to dislike her. I am glad for your husband's sake that she can't go to the hospital and cause trouble and for you that you thought of the grandson angle so you can keep your distance! Stay strong.
10 Feb 10 by member: erikag
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Hope your father-in-law pulls through and glad to hear you mammogram went ok.
10 Feb 10 by member: splendidhammer
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I vote for the pub and have them keep the keys...ok if that isn't an option deep breaths and one foot in front of the other
10 Feb 10 by member: sharonfriz
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Wow you have had quite the day. It just never ends does it. First of all I am really happy all is well with the mamogram. I know how scary that can be. I have had 2 lumpectomys. I am so sorry about your father in law. Your husband must be beside himself. Tell him to ignore the MIL. You know Moose I say pour yourself a good stiff drink and soak in a hot bubble bath and destress.
10 Feb 10 by member: chattycathy1955
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Home. I'm glad to be home. Bob is on his way. I successfully avoided buying 2 pieces of cake for $3.00 at Safeway and opted instead for some turkey pot roast, yes dark meat and more fat but figured it was better for me than the cake and much more satisfying in the long run. I poured myself a jigger of lime flavored vodka into my diet coke and I am exhausted. I was a good girl. I bought the witch some milk ... went over and asked her if she needed anything else and went and picked up a prescription she needed from the pharmacy. I tried to treat her like a "client" and kept in my head that I am doing this for my husband and for my father-in-law ... that helped. Thank you all for listening ... I'm sure you'll hear more from me!! LOL!!! Thank you for your support. I do not like feeling this stressed. I do not like green eggs and ham I do not like them Sam I am!!! My FIL needs open heart surgery. There is a valve that is not working in his heart. That is what the problem is. They will keep him 4-5 days and make sure he doesn't have a viral or bacterial infection and then do the surgery. Then he'll be at least another week in the hospital recuperating before he can go home. Boy ... this drink tastes good!!! Did I tell you I woke up with another stiff shoulder/neck too? Felt fine when I went to bed ... I must have tossed too much. I'm not very good at "losing" it ... but I feel like crying. Just that overwhelmed, I'm so tired, kind of cry. Not so much upset about FIL ... I know the risks but what will be will be ... I love him but I know he isn't going to live forever. I think I worry more about Bob. He is feeling so poorly and has really been pushing himself ... I just don't want him to push himself so hard. LOL ... probably the same thing he is thinking about me! It will be okay, one way or another. I'll be okay. And then there is the pile of stuff at work. Geesh. Fortunately no one, except myself, is giving me grief about that. LOL!! Okay ... this comment should have been a whole other entry. Sorry guys ... just processing. Luv ya all!!!
10 Feb 10 by member: madaboutmoose
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Process away - so much going on!
10 Feb 10 by member: abbadabba
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Sorry I didn't leave a comment yesterday - I read the whole thing, but then my kids started acting up, and I lost track. So sorry to hear about your FIL - that is added stress that you and your husband just don't need right now. Stay strong, and I like your additude of treating your FILS 'wife' like a client - hey, whatever works for you!!!
11 Feb 10 by member: MomofTwoGirls
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Moose you are doing so well at handling everything life is throwing at you! I'm glad your mammo showed nothing to worry about today and I hope your FIL makes a full recovery. Take care of yourself! :)
11 Feb 10 by member: Chris1979
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