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Dear Self,
Stop being an A-hole and get with the program. Zebra cakes have zero nutritional value and no.. they are not a "morning pick me up". We will not "start over tomorrow". We will not put off exercise because we are "busy" with the kids, cows, sleep, housework, or freaking out over what we ate today. Again.. zebra cakes have no nutritional value don't even think about looking at the box to justify them.
We were in shape once. We will get there again. Yes we are a shape now and that shape is round but that's not what I was talking about and you know it. Stop being a butthead. We treated our body well once. There was a time when a zebra cake was looked at with the disgust that it deserves. Yes it deserves it. Stop looking at me like that. No we should not eat them all to get it over with. The children have been raised to sniff these things out and either eat them or take a bite and promptly throw them to the ground where they expect the dog to eat them. Zebra cakes are dog food.
Stress is not an excuse to eat. Life is tough and you're no cupcake. We need to lose the muffin top so that statement is more believable.
In conclusion, Self get your crap together.
Thank you,
Your butt, muffin top, front butt, ankles, and the buff chick living inside you that is getting ready to kick your butt if you eat another zebra cake
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 Comments
"Zebra Cakes are dog food." Game, set, match.
11 Aug 16 by member: 1point21gigawatts
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11 Aug 16 by member: mskestrela
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Zebra cakes were Jack Nicholson's lunch in "The Shining". Hide your kids if you don't hide your Zebra cakes!! LOL. These little cakes contain 8 tsp of sugar per serving, does contain trans-fats (even if the actual number is .49g trans-fat, it is rounded down to 0 on the Nutrition label, meaning if you poke it into a calorie counter as 2 cakes, it still shows 0 trans-fat -- it is never counted), has lots of saturated fats too and worst of all, they carry TBHQ (tertiary butylhydroquinone) which is a petroleum derivative. Yummy?
11 Aug 16 by member: ukeranian
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ukeranian.. you're my new best friend.
11 Aug 16 by member: Ms Elizabeth
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Note to myself - never buy zebra cakes because clearly they are the devil and they try to take over your mind and body with their siren call
11 Aug 16 by member: thingonetwo
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oh. why ...did I read this post. ? I used to LOVE zebra cakes. but i dont allow them over to the house anymore.
11 Aug 16 by member: Marymaryquitecon
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11 Aug 16 by member: SjF60
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Probably a good thing that I don't even know what a zebra cake is ;)
12 Aug 16 by member: schmetterlinge34
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"Life is tough and you're no cupcake" no you're not you are going to get your s##t together and show zebra cake (thanks to the post with the ingredients listed) that YOU can be in control! Great rant
12 Aug 16 by member: vandee60
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This reminds me of a facebook post I made this past March, I was about 4 months into my "lifestyle change" at that time. Ill share .
Dear Little Debbie,
This has been coming for a while and now Im just going to go ahead and say I am breaking up with you on Facebook. While we had a long and happy relationship I have learned that you were really a wolf in sheeps clothing. You proclaimed Oatmeal Cakes,so I thought well everyone knows how healthy oatmeal is , right? Well, no, you were toxic. I havent been letting you come over to the house for months now and you have stopped calling out to me when we are in public, i barely even glance your way. So this is for the best, i am sure you will find someone else. As for me , I think I have found my new best friend, he doesnt come in a fancy box with some cute little girl in pigtails but in a plain green/brown package. Mr. Advacodo, im liking you a lot. :) Peace~
12 Aug 16 by member: Marymaryquitecon
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If it comes in a box, it's probably not real food.
12 Aug 16 by member: erikahollister
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12 Aug 16 by member: Vlapetina
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you gals crack me up...I was talking to pizza like that, just the other day!!!!! Evil demon food...
12 Aug 16 by member: iulani
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