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Okay so had my crying breakdown with regards to work and the workload and my inability to keep up and thus feel like I am doing a good job on anything. I do not think my boss expected me to cry. Something fell through the cracks...I emailed him a PO to review and sign, and he did not sign and I did not follow up with him so it did not get submitted. Of course I feel responsible for it and he said that he appreciated that, but also said that he knew I needed help and was working on it. Said it was not the end of the earth but I still feel like it is. I just went and got a fiber one bar out and took a bite...spit it out and threw it away. Didn't taste that great but I am stressed, depressed...I don't know. I am also sick of this cool weather here. It is mid June and should be warmer than 66 degrees at 1pm in the afternoon. I am tired of feeling like I am cold and like my feet are going to fall off. I don't want to be wearing sweat pants and a sweat shirt in June.
This is the end of my pity party.
Diet Calendar Entry for 13 June 2013:
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480 kcal
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Fat: 46.67g | Prot: 8.14g | Carb: 0.75g.
Breakfast: Challenge Whipped Butter, Darigold Heavy Whipping Cream, Torani Sugar Free Vanilla Syrup, Green Mountain Coffee French Vanilla Iced Coffee K-Cup, John Morrell Lower Sodium Bacon, Bacon Grease, Cream Cheese. more...
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 Comments
Awww, Jaime ...
First let me say that I have missed you tons and I was so excited to see that your daughter graduated and that you got to be there!
I'm so sorry that you're so stressed and depressed. I wonder if it might be a little seasonal? I know that you're from a warmer, sunnier part of the country that you're currently in.
I'm thinking about you, honey. Much love.
xoxoxo
13 Jun 13 by member: atriel2
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Sorry to hear that you had a bad day today. At least you didn't give into the stress by eating. I feel the same way about the weather I wish it would get warmer outside to, but then once it does I will be complaining about it being to hot LOL.
Don't worry to much about today we all have them just brush yourself off and think about tomorrow.
13 Jun 13 by member: Vcravener
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Glad you came on here to vent and also glad that your boss realizes it was't your fault and that you do need help and congrats on not eating crap. It doesn't help, believe me, we've all been there and done that and still felt like crap after, but for more than the original reason. No wonder you are a bit off - the weather sucks, you are overworked, your daughter is away from home and you miss her like crazy. Knowing all that won't make the feelings go away but may help you understand why you feel like you feel. So find some way to treat yourself with either an 'allowable' food or maybe a hug from hubby or a hot bath, blah, blah, blah. A hot bath never did nothing for me - I need food for comfort. Hope coming here helped and that our comments let you know you are supported. Tomorrow will be better :)
13 Jun 13 by member: sarahsmum
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I'm with you on the weather Jaime, I'm sick to death of the cold and the rain, it's just nuts. I don't remember a year this bad, it's like fall every morning and doesn't improve any through out the day so in my opinion you have the right to be depressed over it but I'm afraid that's all I have for you, no insider track to Mother Nature dang it.
Just think of the good though, your daughter is happy, you have a job and you know it's going to get better, somehow, someway, someday.
chin up girl, exercise your frustrations away, beat on something or walk till ya drop
14 Jun 13 by member: Sunkeeper
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Thanks everyone - of course I cried when I read your posts. Ugh the eating crap....oh I wanted to but it was only because there was nothing in the house crap wise to eat. I did go take a soak in the bath later and then just sat in the quiet on the sofa. DH brought me home a wrap from Arby's so not the best thing in the world and a small fry but it could have been so much worse so I am not even going to beat myself up over it.
I know it will have to get better from here....if I can just keep my head above water. I have a membership for the month to tanning (to try to help improve my mood with the weather), but have hardly been able to go to it this week. I will try today.
14 Jun 13 by member: jaime30024
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Glad you felt the love sweetie. And Arby's wrap and fries, yes it could have been so much worse. Hope today is a better day and hope you get that help at work soon, no one can keep up that pace for long before everything suffers, including them.
14 Jun 13 by member: sarahsmum
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hey Neighbor - MAJOR CONGRATS on your girl graduating from Basic!!! That's got to be a big relief - beautiful pic, too!! I love to look at the one of my daughter in her uniform...I really wish she would have stayed in longer than her 4 years, but I understand why she didn't. She has been kicking around the idea of the Reserves, so we'll see what happens.
As far as the cold and rain, at least we're not in Tornado Alley...Scares me to death that Kristi is even on the outskirts of that - she lives just south of Little Rock, AR, and that's just too close for comfort for me. On the upside of that, we'll be there in 30 - count 'em - 30 days!!! just can't wait to see my girls and grandbaby.........sooooooo excited!
Go tanning, take some time for yourself honey!! if all else fails, get yourself a nice bright light for one corner of your house, put on your shades and put your feet up for a while! don't know if it'll help, but it's worth a try. Hugggzzzzzz!
18 Jun 13 by member: kmkjmomma
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Hope you are doing okay, as you haven't been on in a while :)
23 Jun 13 by member: sarahsmum
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Thanks everyone for the posts. I am really trying hard to make the time for myself that I need. Will just have to squeeze it in somewhere.
09 Jul 13 by member: jaime30024
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