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dianecavallero's Journal

 
showing entries 6 to 10 of 31
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02 February 2015

went to gym very late last night, 11 pm, had a pretty decent workout for me, but my knees are failing this time round,. very crunchy inside when i try to do anything resembling a squat. Time to build up my supporting musculature before i do anything stand alone.. so its onto the leg machines and not so much with the vibe plate squats for now til i speak to my GP.

On a more positive note, i was able to do the treadmill for the first time this week, not a huge amount but a respectable 1 km at a decent pace, plus a total of 6 km on the reclining bike at a very vigorous pace.

Did a full round of inner and outer thigh, leg presses, abs, triceps,and core muscles and did a bit of vibe plate stretches and massage at the end which seems to have helped me this morning - i am not crippled with pain today. Just hobbling lol

Off for a gentle walk in the (very cold) woods with the dogs soon

30 January 2015

29 January 2015

Started craptastic, ended ok..

Was extremely tired this morning from staying up too late trying to figure out the sewing project i am doing for a friend, and i faffed about on the computer all day as a result.

BUT, i managed to force myself to the gym, at peak hour, and challenge my social anxiety pretty hard.. and got a better workout in today than last time. Not a proper one like i used to do, but a good start for someone that not too long ago was sleeping 18+ hours a day from depression and never went outside. Facing the crowded times was a good lesson for me. I simply do not give a fuck any more if i am the biggest in there or not, or the oldest or what ever. I am in there to fight this shitty lethargy laziness and physical decay one last time. I am there to get my clubbing body back if i can.

I have hung a picture of my self from 4 years ago, when i felt the best ever, up where i cannot help but see it all day long. To remind myself that i looked like that at age 51, that i had come back not once but twice from being huge (over 100kg) and that there i was a slim 60-65 kg and looked fab.. if ,my body could take the abuse of being big twice and still come out that well, i can at least come close this time, scars and damage and all.

I feel that the diet alone was not working - i was down to 1300 calories per day, and was barely losing a half a kilo a week? I must have short circuited my metabolism from the long long period of total lack of movement of almost any kind and the sleeping all day and night. I obviously have to kick my metabolism in the ass hard to get it to start working again..

well, that is what i will just do then. xx

did more on the bikes than last time at a higher speed and for longer duration. I did in total 6.5 km of biking, vibrating plate squats, side and front one leg balances (badly lol) as well as a seated ab and core crunch on there as well..did a nice set of 3x 20 ab crunches on the machine @ 25 kg, and a 3x 20 set of leg presses at 32 kg.. heel raises 2x 10 at the same weight.. inner and outer thighs, both 3x 20 @ 38 kg.... and i tried the elliptical but i find my foot and knees hurt too much right now for that. But, i did try..

What i found very important, was that i didn't really register the other people there.. it used to be that many people would freak me out, send me running.. today, i was too busy getting my life back to care about them..

after that i went shopping got groceries put them all away and am having a wee few grapes before i take the dogs out for their evening walk.

I am pretty knackered but i feel good about not blowing off the gym after just one visit. I was starting to find excuses.. that shit had to get nipped in the bud. If i don't get more exercise i will never lose weight, it's that simple. I will also never be able to walk properly if i can't take a load off my knees and feet. AND heart disease and diabetes on my dad's side can start to happen now.. time to get serious.

28 January 2015

Weigh-in: 215.4 lb lost so far: 7.1 lb still to go: 50.0 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment losing 0.4 lb a week

25 January 2015

good day, kept busy and didn't think about food while i was working, and that's a first lol.

Sticking to the diet is getting easier as i get busier and have more on my mind that bored eating.

I am seeing the results of slowly reprogramming my sleep pattern .. i am feeling better, more positive and more determined to get back what i lost in health and looks. I am feeling down right feisty of late xx

Slowly taking my personal care into hand as well - Tuesday i go to Bristol to have my dread lady fix up my dreads and make em solid for the next few months, and the little things like nails skin teeth etc are slowly getting sorted.. i am taking an interest n my looks again. I am determined to relearn my old habits of skin care, to get my nails done again and thus prevent the nervous chewing of nails that makes me look like a junkie.. i am taming my eyebrows haha.. and thinking about the ways to repair the damage to my tattoo as well as i can..

I decided to print up a few pictures of me at 51, when i was looking my very best ever, and remind myself that this was AFTER i had been at least 100 kg twice in my life, that i was able to look that good at one point... and ot remember that i can do it again.

Sometimes you need to remember not only the bad stuff but the good stuff that gets over shadowed by that crap.

Anyhow, i am off to continue the tale of trying to make dog coats.. i need more hours in the day lol..

Good luck and health to you all. xx

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