Katsolo's Journal, 21 October 2023

Trying to find words this morning. A lot going on in the world, in my world, and in my life. Very little of it is within my control. I need to recognize that and just keep moving forward. That doesn’t mean I’m going to put on blinders, but I can’t let myself get caught up in those things I can’t control and I can’t let them control me either. That said, there are absolutely things i can influence and am responsible for.

Thinking about another media blackout with the exception of things related directly to work. May or may not include FS, we’ll see. It’s not about ducking responsibility, I absolutely believe we all have responsibilities and moral obligations to do the right thing even when it’s uncomfortable or a stretch. We can all do better, but feeding the beast has to be recognized as a thing that causes it to grow. Posting without reading is my journaling and actually good for me. Got to be some irony in the amount of time it took me to write this.

Things have been weird here at night. I hate walking in daylight because it doesn’t empty my brain the same way and it’s often too hot for the dogs this time of year. I dunno, it’s key to my mental health and I need it.

I’m somewhat annoyed by the numbers this morning, but know that it’s just fluctuations and that the blob has been hitting new lows this week and will continue to do so. Maybe I’ll break out a measuring tape at some point this weekend. The good news is that if i look back over the past year, tossing out any wild anomalies, the blob has been reduced by almost ten pounds. That’s good data for my brain. It means we continue to focus on lean proteins, allow a few special occasions, but remain mindful of the overall goals. A few good things: the tight bras now fit comfortably, I have more than one pair of jeans to choose from on any given day and a lot more options in general.

Didn’t walk last night because i got caught up in a long conversation and by the time it was over, it was too late to do our usual mileage and be safe. Cleaned up around the house instead. The neighborhood food scene is booming with tourists, but the number of people racing down the street in their cars on the weekend is definitely up. We wear lights and reflectors, but walking late on a weekend is much more risky the later it gets and it’s not just the cars. Really wish they’d increase patrols, but weekends are a strain on our police dept in general because things are so nuts in the different parts of the city, mine included. Part of city living and i need to plan better.

I dunno, kinda mired in my thoughts this morning. Will go outside in the sunshine again and see if that elevates my mood. It’s a gorgeous day and I might take the dogs down to the water. I don’t think we can do off leash, but we can walk near the ocean.

WEIGHT 161.0 lb
BMI 32.5
FAT MASS 63.5 lb
LEAN MASS 97.4 lb
WATER MASS 68.2 lb
BONE MASS 4.9 lb
MUSCLE MASS 92.5 lb

161.0 lb Lost so far: 20.0 lb.    Still to go: 26.0 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.

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841 kcal

Fat: 31.35g | Prot: 78.44g | Carb: 65.84g.   Breakfast: Egg White, Egg, Whole Milk. Lunch: Peach. Dinner: Kirkland Signature Breaded Panko Shrimp, Trader Joe's Ahi Tuna Steaks. Snacks/Other: Garden Lites Veggies Made Great Double Chocolate Muffins, Strawberries. more...