laurenwisswell82's Journal, 31 March 2014

Lauren, "when the going gets tough, the tough get going". Let me demonstrate to you that I live by that motto and have done all my life. I was ten years old when I started smoking this was then 1951 and I smoked non stop ever since. It was my father who introduced me to smoking making me stand by his chair and smoke a full cigarette like it or not I had no choice other than a beating with a leather strap. Nine years ago I had a chest infection so went to see the doctor and was told that if I did not stop smoking I would be dead in two years. I left his surgery and stopped outside by the refuse bin. I took it all from my pockets, broke up all the cigarettes and dumped my lighter and all in the bin. I then walked home and as I walked in the door I said to my wife "I have just stopped smoking dear" her reply was amazing when she said to me "OK that's good I don't have a problem with that because I know if you say you have then that's the end of it you have stopped". I have never smoked since ever. Oh Lauren I am not saying it was easy my love not at all, I did suffer for about three weeks then it got better each week. It is my belief that cold turkey is the only way to break it, I do not believe in all the gadgets like patches or electric cigarettes or whatever purely because as long as you use those things you are always thinking nicotine. Now you my dear are attempting to do something really hard in trying to lose weight and at the same time stop smoking. I am not sure that is a good idea perhaps it would be better to stop smoking and continue with a weight maintenance on your current weight you can ditch the weight once you get over the nicotine problem. I know you have a major problem at home with an un-supportive so called husband but nothing in the world will change him but you can prove him wrong and there is nothing nicer in the world than to stick your face right up to his and say............THANKS YOU B"$&^*D....once again you are F$%£&*G wrong I did it without you. 

seeeeee and thats exactly why i love u my friend!!!! 

Very well said Bwy39, hell that left me speechless, all I can say is good luck and I am behind you 100% lauren 

ty SherrieC 

Think of it this way Lauren. Your lungs are damaged right now and there is no fix for a damaged lung. You do not know how bad they are damaged with a Lung Function Test. They could be near the point of COPD or even hit COPD and if that is the case you are then on the road to a wooden box. It could be the start of the road or even just a gate leading to the road but the raod is there right in front of you just waiting for your feet. If you stop now, right now, and never pick up another coffin nail(cigarette) your lungs will get no worse. If they get no worse then your children will not have to see you dying a long and painful death coughing up all sorts of garbage into a bowl at the side of your bed. If you stop right now when young enough for your lungs to make a recovery then you children 2ill never have to say "if mom had of stopped smoking she would still be here today". Please believe me darlin when I say that smoking will kill you in the end. It may not be until you are old like me or even older and it could be even younger but it will happen and the death is not a nice one. There is no other way of putting it to you my love sorry it is dramatic but losing you would be even worse. 

when the going gets tough, Bwy39 will be there to kick your butt... all i want to add, is that you can only control yourself. You do not control the actions of others. My Hubbie, i love him to death, eats a lot in front of me, cake, cookies, pie, chips, chocolate. I'm the one with the problem, i'm the one who just has to deal with it!  

i completely understand what u are saying...which is why i intend to beat this habit. 

Lauren,I will watch you .you must give up the nails. We are on your side , cheering you on .read the last journal bwy39 wrote over and over again then read it again. Let us help you be strong , show your husband you have a hell of a lot more will power than he ever will have. Let's get healthy. 

I live with an underweight, heavily smoking husband who once told me if I lost 25 pounds he'd quit. This was a few years ago and I guess he thought I'd never do it (heck, at that point I really didn't mean it either!!!); Well, I've lost 70 now and there's been no mention by either of us about that little bet. He will probably say he doesn't remember saying it, if I bring it up. He has to quit for his own health without me putting conditions on it, because to be fair he never complained about my weight. So I won''t bring it up. I just take the amount he spends on cigarettes each month (beer too because I don't drink) and spend that same amount on ME :)  

lol i wanna spend that much money on me too lol he smokes and drinks also sooo it is quite a bit! 

Wow! I know all of your messages were for Lauren, but they spoke straight to my heart as well. I've been a smoker since I was a teenager & just stopped smoking last Friday. The weekend was so hard! Today, when I got up, I can truthfully say smoking was not the first thing on my mind - maybe making progress! Lauren, please hang in there! I'm doing the Atkins way of eating & trying to stop smoking too. I hope we can both offer each other encouragement & support. NOTHING, can stop us if we truly believe in ourselves. Wishing you all the best & please let me know how things are going for you! To everyone else, I'm looking for buddies on Fat Secret. If any of you would like to email, I would very much enjoy hearing from you. I can really use all the help & support I can get. THANKS!  

I'd tell you that you should have flicked it out of his mouth, but I won't say that, because you just might do it. *smirk* 

lol now northern do i seem like that kinda person "smirk" lol 

Maybe he knows you so well that he is being negative on purpose so u don't fail... either way you keep doing what you r doing and you will succeed!!! I believe in u!!! 

lol that would be so great mangokiwy but nope hes just an ass lol 

Lol!!!!  

U will rip him a new a$@hole when u succeed lol!!! 

lol do i really come off as violent lol or maybe he will just deserve it lol 

Violence is not an option as violence breed violence and retaliation so don't even consider flicking a cigarette out of anyone's mouth but you do understand it was probably said in jest anyway. No dear Lauren, this problem is yours and yours along and you have to handle it but not by blaming anyone as it is down to will power and determination. All we need you to do now is tell us all you have stopped smoking for ever then report every day for a month that you have not had a cigarette at all. Oh you can crave and will crave but this is where the will power steps in. So GO BABY GO !!!!!!!!!!! 

Well its going to be hard to stop if hes still smoking but you can do it. His undermining you is probably based on his insecurity, if you do manage to give up he will be under more pressure to give up too, if you fail he doesn’t even have to try to give up. It sounds like you were angry when you wrote your passage, BW is right the smoking problem is yours, anger can be a good motivator but its very wearing on you and once you have stopped you would be more likely to smoke again. Let the anger go and get all the support you need from your doctor friends and anyone else you can he will not support you just yet.