Ruhu's Journal, 16 December 2013

Another quick check in as the patient care, holiday prep & life take more of my time than usual, but I did carve out some "me " time yesterday to read & recap the next EWYL-BE chapter so, it's below. And, I must start my day in prayer for much needed serenity --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And I remind myself to pray, breathe, log, journal & express my way on this one day and each of its one meal, moment, bite & emotion. I'm so grateful to have you all here knowing you understand IRL too, my family & IRL friends, having my boys home & the recovery going slowly but going, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love… even when its hectic! xoxox

EWYL-BE Chapter 3 – It’s Not About the Food

As we relearn how to recognize hunger, we may find we want to eat even when there is no physical indication that our body actually needs food. We’re in charge of what we do next (which is different than being in control). Being in control implies that we don’t let ourselves do the things we want & that we do other things even though we don’t want to. Control is what we need to follow the rules of a diet. Being in charge means we get to make choices.

Paying attention to our choices & uncovering the beliefs that motivate one decision over another puts us in charge of our life. If we want to eat or continue to eat when we aren’t hungry, we have 3 options to choose from – eat anyway, redirect our attention, or meet our true needs.

Option 1: Eat Anyway – Even people who eat instinctively sometimes eat when they aren’t hungry. Remember, we are in charge. If we don’t feel that eating is an option, we may enter a Restrictive Eating Cycle, eventually leading to more eating. But eating anyway is not the same as binging anyway.
Advantages – It’s easy. It may give temporary pleasure. It may temporarily distract.
Disadvantages – It may cause discomfort. We may feel regretful. (But we shouldn’t feel guilty – guilt means we are bad; regret means we made a poor decision.) Our body stores it. It can lead to a binge. We haven’t met our true needs.

Option 2: Redirect Our Attention – Find something to do until the urge passes or we get hungry. It works best when we are bored or when something in our environment triggered the urge to eat, like the sight of food. It’s also helpful when we don’t have the time or energy to figure out why we want to eat or how to deal with it. Redirection is a great strategy unless it is our only strategy!
Adv – The urge to eat may pass. It can be a productive use of time. It disrupts the Binge Eating Cycle. We may meet the underlying need.
Disadv – It requires some thought, effort & preparation. (Habits are like deep ruts in a road; you have to turn the steering wheel hard & give the car some gas to pull ourselves out.) It works temporarily. It may not meet our true needs.
Ways to Redirect Our Attention Away From Food – Make a list of activities that appeal to you before you need them. Build a large repertoire of activities. Include activities that are enjoyable, or at least not unpleasant. Include eating-incompatible activities if possible. Be prepared. Establish a food-free Self Care Zone at home & at work. Promise yourself you’ll try redirection for at least a little while.

Option 3: Meet Your True Needs – Figure out why you want to eat & do something to meet that need instead. Remember, when a craving doesn’t come from hunger, eating will never satisfy it. Clearly, meeting our true needs is the most effective option, though not necessarily the easiest.
Adv – It decreases our urges. It improves our overall well-being. It builds new skills. It leads to the best long-term results.
Disadv – It’s the most challenging option (but the most rewarding). It requires time, effort & energy. It requires openness & honesty with ourselves & others. It requires building new skills. It may require asking for help to work through issues, develop new skills & provide support.

When you give yourself the opportunity to make mindful decisions, you’ll probably realize that most of the time, it’s not about the food. Mindful decision-making can also help us think about how our life might change physically, emotionally, educationally, vocationally, financially & spiritually. It puts us in charge of making decisions consciously by considering the advantages & disadvantages of each option. Little by little, as we begin to meet our true needs, we’ll find ourselves bingeing less & living more. (If you, like me, wonder though, how do I know what my needs are and/or how to meet them, stay tuned as we’ll explore that in the next two chapters.)

Diet Calendar Entries for 16 December 2013:
500 kcal Fat: 10.50g | Prot: 38.00g | Carb: 60.00g.   Breakfast: Spectrum Organic Virgin Coconut Oil, Harmless Harvest 100% Raw Coconut Water. Lunch: Lactaid 100% Lactose Free Fat Free Milk, IdealShape Milk Chocolate Meal Replacement Shake. Dinner: IdealShape Vanilla Meal Replacement Shake, Lactaid 100% Lactose Free Fat Free Milk. more...
1871 kcal Activities & Exercise: Sleeping - 8 hours, Resting - 15 hours, Bicycling (fast) - 15/mph - 1 hour. more...
on diet Ruhu's own diet  

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Comments 
Angel - thank you so much for continuing to share the EWYL with us. Reading this made me aware that my biggest pitfall is at night again - and I think it's because I don't want to go to bed, am too tired to do anything else, so TV & eat. I'm going to start going to bed earlier to avoid the eating. Mine isn't upstairs like yours - but then, my guest bedroom IS so maybe I'll try that for a few nights - go up there and stretch across the guest bed, change my location and redirect my thoughts while I assess if I really NEED that second bowl of oatmeal, or even the first. We WILL get thru this, won't we? The ruts of habits run deep at my age - filling them in is taking time as I'm trying to pack those ruts solid now.  
16 Dec 13 by member: FullaBella
Good Monday morning to you. Continue to take care of you as you care for your son. Perhaps we'll connect tomorrow :) 
16 Dec 13 by member: sarahsmum
I needed to read this today! Thanks! 
16 Dec 13 by member: Neptunebch
Thanks for the motivation for today! :) 
16 Dec 13 by member: Mom2Boxers
Thank you taking the time to post the EWLY...it really makes you think about what your doing...Hope all these events get less stressing for you.. Sorry I'm so late but you know I think of you often...Hugs...:O) 
16 Dec 13 by member: BHA

     
 

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