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22 August 2014

TGIF! While I'm not physically feeling great, I'm feeling mentally & emotionally ready to embark on another Operation Weekend Overhaul. I felt so great as I ate & lived healthfully last weekend while enjoying the time away from the routine of the week that I love. And I plan to work to repeat that this weekend, one day or activity or meal or bite at a time, focusing on planning what I'll eat as much as I can while leaving room for the unexpected and staying curious as emotions arise that may bring on cravings.

I'm a bit surprised though that as I've even eating more healthfully and with less extremes between my weekdays and weekend, that I'm having digestive issues (TMI -- constipation, bloating, etc) and a recurrence of acid reflux. It started last Sunday and bothered me on & off through Tues, then got better and now started again last night. I made appts next week with a gastro dr (who I'd seen for a colonoscopy almost 5 years ago) and the naturopath who is filing in for my regular one who is on maternity leave. Hopefully between the two, we'll find out whats up… beside my weight, which may be tied to the gut issues or a result of the traveling, emotional eating, etc. While I'm not happy about the gain, I know with my disordered eating past, eating healthfully & mindfully weekdays & weekends is much, much more important and that the weight will go to where its meant to be.

I'm off to spin class this morning and my doggie and I are having our nails done too -- she at her spa this morning & I at mine this afternoon. DH & I have dinner out at our good friends tomorrow night and lunch on Sunday with friends we haven't seen in a long while, back from when we lived in London, who I also love to be with. But before I get on with my day and the start of a fun-filled, healthy weekend, I'll pray --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And through this one day and each one meal, bite, thought and emotion, I'll pray, breathe, journal, log, stay curious & express my way. I'm so very grateful for each of darling you, my family & IRL friends, the opportunity to own another Operation Weekend Overhaul ahead, spa days (mine & my doggie's), and having the health and wealth to live this life I love! xoxox
Weigh-in: 124.2 lb lost so far: 3.8 lb still to go: 2.2 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (5 comments) on diet Ruhu's own diet   gaining 0.6 lb a week

21 August 2014

Yes, I am so very fortunate to have the time now to sort through my emotions and forge a new course as my birdies leave the nest and mama bird flies more solo again too. And while I'm sad as the intensive child-rearing ends, it is still a very fun & exciting time with my boys. I still love every minute with them, our now more grown-up conversations and the activities we can do together. And I'm excited to try new things, go new places, meet new people and spend more time with those already in my life. As they say, as one door closes another opens. I'm happy too to finally have the time to get to those projects that being a mommy took priority over -- cleaning out & organizing closets and cabinets, photos, filing & paperwork, house updates, etc. While none of those will give me the joy that my boys did, it will feel good to get to those to-do's that never got to-done. And, yes, I'm also looking forward to having more time to read and reflect, take care of me and do as my little heart desires.

For now, enough of what my future holds, today I've been to early workout and am on to book work and errands this afternoon. But first, I'll pray --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion, I'll pray, breathe, log, journal, stay curious & express my way. I've so grateful for each of terrific you, my family & IRL friends, what lies ahead and having the health & wealth to live this life I love today! xoxox

20 August 2014

Emotional eating -- has it been there all along?, as my angel pondered too, am I examining these emotions better as I age because I'm getting smarter?, do I just have more emotions to examine and/or more time to do so? I think, for me, like for many things I'm life, its a combination of these all. Going through menopause, becoming an empty nester (even though one has returned to the nest, but more as an adult then a child to be raised), parenting my mom instead of my sons as she progresses with Alzheimer's , etc. has certainly changed the emotions I'm feeling now. As I've said many times, being a mom was the dream career for me, so semi-retiring from that has been hard for me. Just as my therapist had suggested that there may not be an activity that feels as good (short-term) and emotionally releasing for me as eating sugar, there hasn't been an activity or cause or hobby or job that i've felt as passionate about as being a mom. Don't get me wrong, I'm not interested in starting over again in terms of child raising, but I may not find something else that I'm as passionate about and that so encompasses me as to on its own put food in its proper place. Thats the why for me that I need to work & focus on doing so for myself.

I certainly don't mean to be gloom & doom at all, as this is truly an exciting, adventurous time. I'm trying new things, going new places and spending time with new people (like all of awesome you)! And as I've done with my eating, I'm seeing what works for me, what I want to do more of and letting go of the rest. So, it's a really exciting time too with much self-reflection and major life & relationship improvements with my DH and others.

So, I'm off now to some of those things I truly love (like all of you) now -- praying followed by a good workout --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And I'll pray, breathe, journal, log, stay curious & express my way through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion. I'm so grateful for each of brilliant you, my family & IRL friends, more beautiful weather on the east coast, & having the health & wealth to explore and live this life I love! xoxox

19 August 2014

Tuesday tennis this morning and then up to work for the afternoon, followed by a walk with my doggie. We've had the most beautiful weather, and I'm loving every moment in it.

ATF stays good and I'm, as usual, loving the routines of my weekdays. I had a great call with my health coach reinforcing all the good of Operation Weekend Overhaul, and especially my recognition that much of my eating issues revolve around my emotions… something that's been there all along, but since this is a process with much trial & error, I'm just really getting the impact my emotions have on me and how food has been the way I've dealt. Staying curious as emotions come & go and drive my cravings seems to be the key, for while I may still eat at some of those times, if I continue to learn, I'll make the progress I desire. Progress, not perfection stays my goal.

So, as I stay curious today, I'll first pray --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And I'll pray, breathe, log, journal, stay curious & express my way through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion. I'm so very grateful for each of marvelous you, my family & IRL friends, a health coach who really understands & supports me while encouraging me in healthy ways, another beautiful day and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

18 August 2014

Operation Weekend Overhaul was a huge success and I'm feeling great this Monday morning, even after a horribly sleepless night. I slept from 9:30ish to midnight, then was up & down the rest of the night. But still I feel good, so far, went to early workout and will nap/rest as I need today.

The weekend was surprisingly easy. I wasn't even really tempted or craving anything but whole, healthy foods. I noticed some minor wishing it were better for me when the others ordered dessert when we were out to dinner Sat night, and again as we were leaving the lake yesterday which i know it particular is a long-standing habit for me to have sweets on Sunday nights after dinner. Instead I had a healthy snack and was satisfied and happy that I made a better choice for me.

It still intrigues me though that some weekends or other times (for me, when I'm traveling, holidays, etc) are so difficult and food seems to be constantly calling vs times like this past weekend when food has taken its proper place as nourishment and an accessory to life. I think for me it's all connected to my emotional state, as I'm realizing more & more that I've used food to deal with emotions since I was young.

So, I'll be sure to continue to focus on my emotional state during food-calling times, staying curious & looking for healthier ways to deal with my feelings. But, for now, I'm back to my weekday routine, but happier & healthier than many past Mondays. I have my usual house & book work to do and a phone call with my health coach this afternoon. I've stopped seeing the therapist as I'm feeling good about going it alone, plus the health coach costs a fraction of the price and has been tremendously helpful in many of the same ways. But first, I'll pray --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And through this one day and each one meal, moment, thought, bite & emotion, I'll pray, breathe, journal, log, stay curious & express my way. I'm so very grateful for each of wonderful you, my family & IRL friends, feeling so good even after very little sleep, hot bulletproof coffee, that I'm a good power napper and can take one if/when needed, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love. xoxox

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