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Okay--so here's a first for me. Something that I never thought I would say--I do not prefer the potato chips to the fruit. *gasp* I can hear ripples of shock around the country as friends everywhere, and not just the ones at FS, feel the equilibrium of space and time shift. Let me repeat myself for those who think they may have misheard--I do NOT want the potato chips, I WANT the fruit! I know, I barely recognize myself. Here's the story:
I decided today that since I lost 4 pounds (I know, I just can't stop saying it with a silly grin on my face) last week, that I might have a special treat today. Just a small one, mind you, but a treat nontheless. As Monica says on Friends about her inner fat girl, "I never let her eat!", I felt that my inner fat girl needed a treat for all that I have put her through both physically and emotionally over the past couple of weeks. I honestly was not craving anything unhealthy--I wasn't hungry at all--but I thought I would make an active and conscious choice to eat something horribly bad for me, with no guilt whatsoever. We have Lay's chips in the giant bags on sale, buy 1,get 1 free, and I still had some grocery money left over, so I'm not over budget on my Food Stamp Challenge, (see August 22nd for details) so I bought a monster bag of BBQ chips. When I got home I turned on FS, and settled down with a bowl of chips, anticipating how good that first chip would taste. It tasted okay, not great, but okay, so I ate the first bowl then went and got a second, 'cause if you're gonna eat something yucky you might as well do it right. I made it through the second bowl, and you know what? The only reason I'm sorry I did it is because those chips just honestly didn't taste good. Not good at all, and certainly not like I remembered them. Now, what I really want, is some fresh, juicy apple slices with a little sugar-free fruit seasoning on them. Either something is wrong here, or something is finally really right. That bag of chips is gonna sit on the counter until Hill eats them, or I throw them away. I used to be able to eat one of those bags by myself in one sitting--and still want more. I keep getting farther and farther away from the person I was before beginning this journey, and yet getting closer and closer to the person I was before I started allowing junk, both literally and figuratively to take hold of my life. Now I'm just waiting for the day when I'm lying in my cloud of a bed, with my soft pillows, drowsy pets and dozing man and think, you know, what I'd really rather be doing right now is kicking it on the treadmill!
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