Dani_Suave's Journal, 25 January 2012

So God amazes me. Yea, thats kinda His job, but sometimes its just mind boggling the things He does to reach me.

For example.

My mother wanted to win the big 'go see Ellen for her birthday show' trip and was begging anyone and everyone to write in in hopes they would win and take her along. After much ado I acquiesced and went to the facebook page, did the whole rigamarole, and there was an essay they required to enter. The whole thing was supposed to be answering the simple question "Whats your story?"

How does one answer that query? So simple I thought I could bang out a response in 2 minutes if I proofread. I love to write, so coming up with a short way to summarize my story shouldn't be too difficult right?

After thinking about where to begin for about 5 minutes, I started typing. 15 minutes later, I deleted and started over. 5 minutes after that I killed it again. A short 1500 character blip and I couldn't figure it out. So I left the computer for a while to think. It really came down to a serious search of myself. What is my story? What do I want in life? Where am I going, who do I think God is calling me to be?

I'm telling you guys, I really sat down and dug in. Some easy things that came right away are the most crucial to who I am. Being Mom is my most important function besides being a Follower. How to accomplish those goals while still paying the bills has been my main concern of course.

I've tried different ways to stay close to home while bettering myself since DD was born. I did the whole go back to school and keep baby in daycare on campus, then got hired at the daycare, then quit school and just worked at the daycare. Then it ended up with her being in full time daycare while I work elsewhere, and thats where I've been stuck for the past 2 years. 2 years of letting other women raise my baby so I can pay them to do it! Somethings gotta give.

So if I want to be self sufficient, able to be home with my kid, and still doing something to help the world at large what can I do? Whats my story? Where do I go from here?

Then my writers block cleared and I realized that the idea to start my own business should be taken off of the shelf and reexamined. So I sat down and dusted off that little piece of coal from the dark celler of my mind. And something shiny started to emerge.

I love sewing and crafting. Its a hobby I've always wanted to explore, especially after sewing a few things for my own kiddo. Living in the Northwest I think there might just be a real market for hand made products. If I can get a booth going at saturday market, whip up some business cards and get a website going, I thought it might make a passable way to stay above water and work part time while the kid is in school.

But thats just a passing fancy right? It can't be that simple.

Then something out of the ordinary happens a couple of days later. Nothing radical, entirely plausible, nothing that would make headlines. I ran into an old friend, 2 days overdue with her first child, at wal mart of all places. (I avoid that place like the plague.) Just a quick "hey hows it going, sorry you're overdue and congrats" conversation ensued, and I went on with my day.

Last night, she calls me up in tears. Luckily I've had the same phone number since highschool. After our run in the other day I was the first one to come to mind when as a new first time mom she couldn't put her baby down without the baby throwing a fit. She happened to remember seeing me with my daughter in her sling and pretty much begged me to make her one.

Coincidence? Or something more? Seems He might be trying to say something, no?

249.2 lb Lost so far: 54.8 lb.    Still to go: 89.2 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.

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1424 kcal

Fat: 108.13g | Prot: 72.16g | Carb: 50.73g.   Breakfast: peppermint tea, stevia, string cheese, peanut butter fudge. Lunch: string cheese, Low Carb Broccoli Cheese Soup. Dinner: Macadamia and Flax pancakes. Snacks/Other: string cheese, peanut butter fudge bar. more...

3383 kcal

Activities & Exercise: Sleeping - 7 hours, Desk Work - 8 hours, Resting - 7 hours, Driving - 2 hours. more...