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Good morning!
So, today is a shocker. Literally. :)
Today is the day I am going to the hospital for my 2nd shock to the heart.
I'm not dreading it the same way as I did last time, when I was scared out of my mind, but I can't help but be very anxious about it. Of course. I think that's a natural reaction to having something like this done.
It's gonna be all day in the hospital. I'm due there at 8:30 am, will probably have the shock at around 11, if it's anything like last time, and then have to stay for some hours for observation, to ensure that everything is fine.
...
I'm curious to ask them about stress levels and the hear procedure.
I'm stressing bad, and yesterday was hell. It was really bad.
I just want all this crap done and over with.
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Because of the stress, all food plans went down the drain yesterday. Again. I was WAY over any acceptable amount of calories, and I honestly didn't care at all. I ate what I wanted at the moment, and it was a lot of junk.
I spent a little time this morning tracing back my intake, and registering it all to the best of my abilities, to keep me accountable for the mishaps, to learn from it, and for it to adjust my numbers onwards.
There's nothing I can do about it now, so I'm not gonna worry about it. The "penalty" has been calculated, and it doesn't make all that big a dent in my calorie allowance. Phew.
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Today's allowance is 3000 calories. I will probably go lower for three reasons. First of all, I feel horrible about yesterday. It was nothing but dumb moves, and I feel that I should show myself that I can do better. It might not be the smartest time for it, but I do want to try. Second, since I will be at the hospital, mostly sitting all day, my calorie burn will be LOW. I will probably be at around 2000-2500 calories, if I'm lucky. So any intake higher than that will make me work against my goals. Third, being at the hospital and away from all foods, today would be a great day to do a "hunger resetting" fast day. Maybe it's time for me to get in touch of when I'm hungry and when I'm not.
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I have purposefully NOT packed any food. I have packed a couple of low calorie protein shakes.
Hopefully they'll help me survive.
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Today, I'm thankful for:
- Hospitals and free health care.
- Wife
- Morning coffee, and probably MANY cups during the day.
Have a great day, people! Life is good!
EDIT:
Just wanted everyone to know that the procedure is done and everything is okay. Heart rate is normal.
END OF EDIT.
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192.0 lb
Lost so far: 149.7 lb.
Still to go: 4.6 lb.
Diet followed poorly.
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gaining 24.7 lb a week
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