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Weight History
showing entries 61 to 65 of 395
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22 July 2013
I am totally exhausted today. I had the monthly thing going on, I was busting out of my clothes from the bloat and had cramps all day long. I didn't have a great day at work, and one of my tires is busted and I went to Sears after work to have it repaired and they wouldn't take it for 3 days. So I'm driving around town on a donut. Great. What does all of this have to do with eating? Stress, stress. I can tell you I lingered in front of the donut display for several minutes at several different convenience stores today. I want a maple bar so bad. Or a cinammon roll. Or donut holes frosted in chocolate and sprinkles. I want sugar! I did give in - I had 2 servings of Reese's sugar free minatures for lunch. I have several reasons why I ate it. First of all, I was jonesing for something sweet. Second of all, I am having digestion issues, and if you're not regular actually garbagey sugar free chocolate is a good thing to eat because it has a laxative effect. So that was my reason #2 to eat it. So I ate it. I also had an apple. Not the healthiest, I will be the first to admit. But it felt great, seeing as it's been about a month since I have eaten candy of any kind. I have really had to crack down - no candy, no cookies, and now no ice cream. I can eat all of those things outside the house, but in the house, no way. If they are in the house I will eat the whole box and cannot stop. If they are out of the house, and they require driving, spending money, having access to only one finite serving, then I can have them.
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21 July 2013
Yesterday was a good day for me. I kept it below 1500 calories and I ran a 10K, 6.4 miles. I haven't run that far in about a month, it felt great to be able to do that. I feel pretty good today. I woke up early on Sunday morning, had breakfast and coffee, and took the dog for a walk in the rain-cooled weather. I think I will go to the gym and walk today. I feel a little sore, and just gently moving my body probably would be a good idea. If I'm not going running, I like to walk about 4 miles at the gym on the track. I feel like I need to affirm my commitment to losing more weight every day. I feel like I have 40 more pounds to lose. I weigh 178 right now, I think if I got down to 138, that would be a healthy size for me. I'd like to get down to my high school weight, but I am not sure that goal is reasonable. I am 40 years old. I don't see myself being able to duplicate a weight when I was 16 years old. That goal seem insurmountable. I think I just need to take goals as they come. My main goal right now is to fit into my size 8 jeans. That is not going to require me to weigh 120 pounds. That is not even going to require me to weight 140 pounds. I think if I could lose 15 to 20 pounds I could get into an 8. So that's what I'm shooting for. That and just putting time together one day at a time.
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18 July 2013
Some nights when you get home from work, some nights you are going to say the hell with it. I am not saying that about food - I had a good day with it today. But exercise? It is 100 degrees here and I had to stay late at work and let two client's family members practically scream at me for an hour and 15 minutes. Only to be told that it is my fault they are unhappy with their parent's care because I didn't do a good enough job of explaining my role. Yeah, great, thanks. So I didn't get home until like 6:20, and I just couldn't deal with trying to eat dinner and go to the gym by 7:30. It just wasn't happening today. I am excited about the other pound I lost - I am back down to 178, which seems to be the magic number for me before I'll cheat or binge again. I am going to stay on track! I did eat half a donut today, but I recorded it and I still stayed pretty good on the calories and carbs. A momentary sin, but it did not drive me to any more indulgences. I am going to do this. I had not lost any weight the last two doctor's visits I had, and my superful doctor expressed her concerns that I had gained 7 pounds since last October. She does have a point. The scales do not lie. I admit that I have slacked, binged and overeaten for about the last 8 months. The lowest I got down to was 169, which was like a miracle. I have slowly gained back like 13 pounds from there. 13 pounds! I have to stop this. I worked too damn hard to get this weight off. And I hate, HATE that there are two pairs of size 8 jeans in my closet that I bought when I weighed 169 and just thought 10 more pounds and I will get into them. Yeah! I want to get into them. I do, ohhhh do I. I am resolved to be serious and accountable. It seems the only thing that I have maintained well is exercising. I ran a 10K a couple of months ago, and I have been consistently running 4 miles or a 5K at least 3 times a week. That's probably why I haven't gained anymore than I have. Anyway, FatSecret friends, I am trying to get back on this site, participate, and just do my thing on here. I am trying my best to contribute to that with this journal entry.
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17 July 2013
I have lost a pound. Doesn't seem like much but when I got on the scale today it was exactly what I needed. I need to get back involved on this site. I did better when I was logging both food and exercise every day and posting journals regularly. This site really helps me keep accountable. I have to do better. I don't have to write a book for my journals, just a little bit. I am making more of an effort to log my exercise. It's just a few minutes a day - well, let's get serious and say it's like 30 minutes a day for me usually. Still, I get great benefit out of it. I have lost as much as 2 pounds in these last few weeks but I eat poorly and then it's up 2 pounds again. I need to get in the groove again.
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16 July 2013
Here it is evening again, and this is where I am plagued with my deepest food cravings. It's not just candy and ice cream and junk I crave, because I do, but I want the leftover steak that's in the refrigerator, but I also want broccoli and ranch dressing. This sucks. All I want to do is eat. I could seriously eat an entire box of graham crackers right now. Or an entire box of sugar free lemon cookies. Or an entire bag of Russell Stover candy. I used to buy that sweet stuff but I have learned that I will eat it ALL if I buy it and bring it in the house. I used to be able to control my ice cream eating, but not anymore. I eat too much, and it goes too fast. No more ice cream in the house. The only sweet thing I have left in the house is sugar free pudding. I can see that going, too. I have never been out of control of eating it but I worry what I will do in the future with no other sweet stuff to eat. There is no way I will be satisfied with just fruit. Also, being diabetic, I have to watch my fruit consumption. One piece of fruit is fine. Too many and I have issues with the fructose. Bummmmed out about this. I guess I just have to see how far I can go with no sugar free treats, and then hopefully I will truly endulge in the future, not all the time like I have been. I can't promise that I will never eat sugar free snacks again, but I can do my best not to eat them on a weekly basis.
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