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Weight History
showing entries 6 to 10 of 57
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26 November 2014
Thanks to the support I have received once more from lovely FS people, I have managed to leave the doldrums and started on the house cleaning and diet. I can't do Atkins. Although it gets good results and is easy to follow, I don't like the lack of energy and all the other stuff that goes along with it. So it's goodbye Athkins and hello 5:2.
Thanx FS friends. You rock x x
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22 November 2014
So many people have to go through a lot in this life. I am grateful for all that I have and that my father had a good life. Writing things down has made it clear for me. I don't feel guilty. Of course I would have been there if I had known. Because that is the kind of person I am. Self doubt is no good for the diet. It's no good for anybody. I shall clean the house this weekend and next week I will clean my mind and body.
(1 comment)
21 November 2014
3 October was the last time I was here. I feel so strange. It's time to move forward. So I was in the UK for the saddest of reasons. To bury my father. He was not the kind of father I would have wanted. But he was not a bad man and he loved me. Of course, I loved him and was very upset. I am relieved that he will not suffer full on dementia and further disability. But I am sad for my stepmother who is really sad and lonely. He could be a very difficult man to live with but she loved him dearly.I was not with him at the end. Not given all the facts about his condition and my aunt told me not to come in the end as she thought I wouldn't make it in time and that he wouldn't know me. Should I have gone anyway? My stepmother was very angry with me that I didn't come earlier. But I can't just jump in the car and be there. She has since apologised. But there are a few questions in my mind. He fell off a ladder! He could hardly walk. What was he doing up a ladder? It happened on a Monday and I didn't get a call until Thursday. He didn't go to hospital till Wednesday. He must have had so much pain as he had six broken ribs. I did get to talk to him on the phone. He told me he was on the mend but I couldn't understand him much and I didn't speak to him for long. At that time, I thought he was OK. One day he was OK and due to go for an operation. The next day he was on palliative care. He died on Tuesday morning. At the funeral, I found out all the details I wasn't told. I do feel that my stepmother should have called an ambulance immediately. I have questions as to what happened. She told me that she was in bed and didn't hear him calling. I don't think for one minute that anything suspicious happened. I just think she could have called for an ambulance earlier. Perhaps I should have jumped on a plane earlier. A big part of me is also relieved that I didn't see him like that. How weak I have become. I used to be so strong. Anyway. It was his time.
I have hidden away behind doors. Drinking too much and eating crap.Spain is calling. Yesterday I rang about a house to rent which sounds perfect. I may go over to Spain soon to have a look. This place is full of boxes and all the things that I had left in the villa. I have to sort it all out and get rid of a lot. I have so much to do that it overwhelms me. But I should be very grateful that I have such a good life. I often wondered how I would feel when my father died. Now I don't really know.
(6 comments)
03 October 2014
Well, for two weeks now, I have been a very naughty girl. Stress eating and drinking followed by celebrating with pizza and beer. Very naughty indeed. I was very stressed. Trying to sell my house and feeling like everyone hated it or if they did like it, they didn't want to pay my price. Then, deep joy! One guy walked in and bought it right there and then. Celebration time! Meals out with wine and all that. Resulting in tight clothes and pot belly. So here I am back on FS. Truly remorseful. I'm not going near the scales 'till I feel near to what I was. Naughty person.
Most meals tasted so terribly salty. And I had lots of cravings for everything. So it's back to Atkins because I just don't have cravings and I never feel hungry. Six months to get fit and healthy before the great relocation to Spain. A new life beckons. I am so excited
(6 comments)
17 September 2014
I had some processed food last night. Boy did it taste salty. I am convinced that I need to carry on my path. Food logging, weighing. Cut out sugar, wheat and processed food. I have wobbles (in more ways than one) but I shall carry on regardless. I do miss Puhpine telling me to roll with the punches. Support and empathy is brilliant but sometimes you just need someone to tell you to 'sort your life out'. Today is a new day and a new opportunity for anything!
There are some builders working next door. Boy do they graft. Some of them are from Syria. They speak Arabic I think. They have come to Turkey to work because of the war in Syria. How sad. The poor people there have nothing. There is no food. Nothing. And they are being killed. What a world we live in. Terrible
(2 comments)
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