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Good Tuesday Morning.
Just read comments on my last journal and as always I am touched by your comments. Two things have happened ( well more than likely many more than two things). A dear friend (a former roommate for DH and a dear friend to us both) saw his wife slip away in the night after a long illness. We haven't seen him in over a decade but he remains near and dear to our hearts. He and his bride of 22 years lived in Texas. Many tears have been shed and his comments about his wife touched me deeply. I didn't know her well but my friend cherished her and cared for her when she was certainly not at her best for years. Of course it reminded me, once again how precious each moment is and caused me to reflect on my own circumstances.
The second thing is that I have started to wrap my head around eating. After much anguish, frustration, and confusion I've decided to adopt a plantbased diet. Read Forks Over Knives, The Starch Based Solution and been adjusting how I eat accordingly. DH has wanted to eat more like this for health reasons. I did this before, about a decade ago with good results. Since then I've lost weight a number of times with a variety of approaches only to gain it all back, time and time again. My journey in this body. The weight is bad enough but what I do to myself, my soul and spirit is worse. I beat on myself incessantly. I spend far too much time feeling unworthy. I am so tired of it. It exhausts me.
No calorie counting simply a change in what I eat. Basically a vegan approach. Guess what? I'm eating food I love, comfort foods ( with just a few minor adjustments) and I've shed a few pounds! I've been cooking again (something I had tired of as well) and actually enjoying it. It is slower than I'd like but it is kinder to my soul and probably also my poor body. What I really like is I can eat without feeling deprived. That is a huge plus for me. When I'm hungry I eat. I'm thinking this isn't a diet. This is a way to eat. I'm not saying I'll never eat meat or dairy but I will eat it rarely. DH will likely eat meat and dairy more often than myself. That's up to him to decide. He is supportive, willing to try my concoctions and I'm hopeful. I'm hopeful I will start feeling well enough again that I will feel like exercising again too. In time.
Yesterday I upgraded my phone to a 6 Plus and am loving it! We also went to Trader Joes and stocked up on things that are pricier and/or unavailable in our small town. And, DH and I got to spend the day together outside of the house ( a rarity these days with us working different shifts).
So today begins on a positive note. There is much more on my mind than I am sharing but I feel more balanced than I have in a while. With that said I suppose I ought to get my rear in gear and get ready for my day. Whether rich or poor, whether valued or dismissed by some, whether fat or thin I do have a partner, a witness to my life. I don't know how long I'll have him but even after he is gone from this earth the journey we have shared together lives on in my heart and mind. Let me remember. Let me be present. Let me be kind to myself and others. Thank you for being a part of my journey. Take care of yourselves!
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253.4 lb
Lost so far: 5.8 lb.
Still to go: 68.4 lb.
Diet followed reasonably well.
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losing 1.7 lb a week
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