Diea's Journal, 22 January 2018

I just realized that I have been eating over my caloric goal for the last week. The last time I ate within target was last Monday, a whole week ago! I can feel the bulge above my bellybutton line building up.

It makes sense why I went astray. I've been going through a bit of a roller coaster with these job applications. I spent all this time applying to positions across the state. Then, when I began getting interviews, I realized that I actually do not want to leave my city at all. I've always had a love/hate relationship with my hometown, and I finally feel at-home here. I want to be close to my family, my partner, my friends. I don't want to go. I thought I did, and I realized how wrong I was when it came time to buy the airline tickets. Yes, these jobs pay well and all. But I know that money won't shape my happiness, at least not completely. I'd rather be with my support system.

Well, when I had this realization, I started feeling like such a loser for going through all those applications for nothing. Each one took me 3-8 hours to complete, and I did a lot of them! I was feeling like a failure for not being honest with myself, for "wasting time," for chickening out, and for so much energy expended for nothing.

It took me a while to recover from that. I now see why this helped me, why it's a positive thing for me. I feel better.

Thank you for being here, FS. It really helps me re-center and focus on my health and well-being to write this out.

It's time to climb back on the wagon and get these calories down and the fitness time up.

May you all have a beautiful week!

Diet Calendar Entry for 22 January 2018:
1500 kcal Fat: 53.97g | Prot: 31.44g | Carb: 237.22g.   Breakfast: Chocolate Sandwich Cookies (with Extra Creme Filling), Coffee, Honey, Laura Scudder's All Natural Old Fashioned Smooth Peanut Butter, Trader Joe's Sprouted Flourless Whole Wheat Berry Bread, Pineapple, Oranges. Lunch: Lettuce, Mustard, Oranges, Tomatoes, Onions, Avocados, Trader Joe's Sprouted Flourless Whole Wheat Berry Bread, Fruit Smoothie (made with Fruit or Fruit Juice only). Dinner: Lime Juice, Tortilla, Cooked Spaghetti Squash (Fat Not Added in Cooking). Snacks/Other: Popcornopolis Caramel Corn Popcorn, Keebler Coconut Dreams Cookies. more...

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Comments 
Yes, it's better to have gone through this other wise you'd been always left wondering! As far as your calorie intake any thing not used will go to fat. Over to fat..under your body stores for fat, if this makes sense to you.Find your RDI and stick to it or as close as possible.Also as a dam sure always create a deficit from working out and you Will Lose that hard fat and you'll have solid losses,no yo yo effect and your arrow will always point down. p.s. Did I mention you have to work out to. I hope this info was helpful Diea. 
23 Jan 18 by member: murphthesurf
🤷🏻‍♀️Sometimes you have to spend the time to realize exactly where your heart is! Good on you for figuring it out! It will only make you stronger!🙋🏻 
23 Jan 18 by member: smprowett
Thank you, murphthesurf. These are good reminders. But, the RDI number is always weight gain for me. My RDI is supposedly 2042, but I start to gain weight around 1850. I set my own caloric daily goal at 1500, mostly this is weight loss territory and because this is easy to remember (500 calories max per meal). Plus, it's not extreme so I'm hoping this promotes a long-term weight loss lifestyle. I know I lose 2 lbs a week if I do 1325 a day, but I don't want to live like that again, at least not right now. It's too extreme, and my body just doesn't want to do it again. Anyway, thanks for helping me think about this again, murphthesurf! 
23 Jan 18 by member: Diea
Thank you, smprowett!! I definitely spent a lot of time and found where my heart is. Well said, and thank you for listening. :) 
23 Jan 18 by member: Diea
I know, as all of you know, weight loss is hard, I was 275 pounds It took more then a yeat, but I wasn’t good all the time. I had cake, candy, and pizza. I didn’t get on the scale much. I'd see a little here and there, but I’m now 125. Sometimes I think it’s a mistake, I don’t remember ever weighing 125. I still have a hard time believing it. I kept thinking that the scale must be broken. I’ll tell you the best way to weight loss, is portion control. I’d make my plate, and then cut it a little at a time. I didn’t start out eating half the food, but that’s where I am now. Every day, I would just take off a little more.  
03 Jun 18 by member: nymelody
Yeah and also, I have MS and am in a wheelchair and really can’t do much. I’ll lift my legs in the chair, do arm circles and any other way I can move my body in a wheelchair. I’m also not consistent with the amount of time, some days I do more more and other days I do less, and some days I do nothing. I’m in a wheelchair living in a nursing home.  
03 Jun 18 by member: nymelody
Thank you for sharing, nymelody. Congrats on your weight loss. It sounds like you made your goal. That's so awesome. And yes, we gotta do what we can. Keep it up, and thank you thank you! 
10 Jun 18 by member: Diea

     
 

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