madaboutmoose's Journal, 20 August 2011

Saturday ... bright blue skies, chilly morning air, a good night's sleep and a dip in the scale!!!

I have to confess, I did take something to help me sleep last night but still I was able to wake up, take the dog out to do his business, lay back down and sleep for a couple more hours!! Probably could have slept longer but I wanted to get a few things done today other than sleep.

I'm in the midst of laundry, drinking coffee, and had a chat with two of my three kids on facebook. The only bummer was hearing from my one son a story that our other son told him that was a lie. I'm sort of upset by it. No, I am very upset as I learned he told the same lie to our daughter. We've been estranged from 2 of our 3 kids, my hubby's children from his first marriage for a number of years ... very long story that I won't bore you with right now.

Our daughter re-initiated contact with us this past year and that is going well. A couple of years ago we ran into our son at Wal-Mart with his new girlfriend and talked to him for quite a while. Brian indicated he would like to see us and we encouraged him to call us anytime. We've heard nothing from him since, even though he lives in the same small town we live in.

So he told our other son, Josh, that he saw us at Wal-Mart and we ignored him. Told his sister the same story very recently. I cannot tell you how much that upset me. We took his daughter, our granddaughter into our home as foster parents when he and the mother of his child screwed up and got themselves involved with the system. We took him into our home as an adult to try to help him out and get his life back on track. We paid for the family attorney for him to get a custody agreement. We fought for a relationship with he and his sister when his mother was telling lies about us. We would still welcome him into our hearts (be it with some reserve) if he reached out to us.

Anyway, I need to put that back in a box. It hurts too much to let it out. Brian will be 30 this month. Does the pain ever stop? What hurts the most is him telling lies to our other two kids. It's the same old thing, just like his mother lied about us all those years ago.

Well, thanks for listening. It still will be a good day. I have no control over that situation.

I better get my rear in gear ... I do have plans for the day!!!

I am grateful ... truly I am ...

for

1. Sleep!!!! Restful sleep!!!
2. The weekend!!!
3. Two of my three children at least talk to me!!
4. Clean sheets, not a lot of laundry to do, and maybe a movie tonight!!
5. Finding a place called The Office where I might be able to do my little part time business venture without costing an arm and a leg for overhead!!!

Kindness continues ... with never ending challenges. I am going to focus on remaining on track this weekend and not making excuses to myself that I can just "let go" ... I do so want to see progress. I added flax oil daily to my diet which increases my fat calories but I have just read so much about how beneficial it is for overall health. I hope I haven't made a mistake by doing so. What do you all think? I hope you have a great day ... I look forward to many more!!
208.6 lb Lost so far: 50.6 lb.    Still to go: 23.6 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.

Diet Calendar Entries for 20 August 2011:
1313 kcal Fat: 43.51g | Prot: 91.49g | Carb: 114.90g.   Breakfast: shredded cheese Great Value, large egg, Jennie-O Turkey Bacon, Athenos Crumbled Feta. Lunch: sweet and spicy tuna, flatbread crisps. Dinner: boneless chicken breast, Feta Cheese Crumbles, red onion, Original Iceberg Garden Salad (Zip), butter, Newman's Own Sweet Ginger, roll. Snacks/Other: popcorn, Barlean's Flax Oil, Select 55. more...
2769 kcal Activities & Exercise: Elliptical - 38 minutes, Resting - 15 hours and 22 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
losing 2.1 lb a week

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Comments 
Carol, family hurts. Certainly because we grew up with them, or raised them, or know them since we are young. Family hurts much more than strangers because we care about them. After all you did for him, your son should be at least grateful. I'm sorry he isn't... But hey, you have another wonderful son, I know that ;-) About fish oil, I think it's a great idea. Looking at your daily deficit you can definitely add good fats to your diet! Have a good day my friend, I'm so glad you got a good night sleep! 
20 Aug 11 by member: jessyline
Oh! I forgot... Congrats for the dip in the scale!! 
20 Aug 11 by member: jessyline
Thanks Anne on all accounts. I just tried something different on my elliptical this morning too ... tried to alternate the lowest level with the highest level every 2 minutes. I know the recommendation is every minute but I can't figure out how to do that on my machine. The interval program changes every 2 minutes. So I'm just going to do 38 minutes each morning, changing from highest level/resistance to lowest level/resistance every two minutes and see what that yields. What do you think? 
20 Aug 11 by member: madaboutmoose
Interval training will be harder (in the beginning) but much more efficient. The bests workouts are the ones that constantly vary, in my opinion. Is the highest level very hard? Can you make it two minutes? The hardest part of the workout should take out out of your comfort zone, I mean really. Two minutes could be too long... Especially if you want to go for 38 minutes. You can mix different levels, like low, medium, high, medium, high, low etc... Can you program something like that? One minute at 90% effort is hard, I don't know if it's good to try and go longer. Always warm up 5 minutes at a low level before you start pushing it. And don't forget the 5 minutes cool down after your hard work. Oh, and when the highest level on the eliptical gets too "easy" (it will happen!), consider throwing a sprint here and there...  
20 Aug 11 by member: jessyline
The highest level is tough but not too tough ... maybe not tough enough?  
20 Aug 11 by member: madaboutmoose
I don't have any trouble doing 2 minutes.  
20 Aug 11 by member: madaboutmoose
Sorry about the family stuff. All I can think is...what a waste. SUch nonsense on their part and time with people you love is really our greatest treasure. Wish family wasn't so hard. Glad you got the good sleep you needed : ) 
20 Aug 11 by member: sharonfriz
Thanks Sharon ... you know how it is ... unfortunately. It is what it is ... I'm tempted to send him a message on facebook and give him a piece of my mind ... but I'm not sure I can spare much!! 
20 Aug 11 by member: madaboutmoose
Well done on the dip on the scales. I can identify with only speaking to 2 out of 3 children. I too have a son who caused havoc in our family and have had no contact for some years and who seems to have little or no regard for the family and moral values we tried to instil in him. I coped with drugs, alcohol, prison and major theft from our home and I've lost count of the times and the money it took to sort him out and set him on the right road. He's now filed in one of those boxes and I rarely open the lid. Its too painful as you say and a facebook message won't make you feel better and will give him something concrete to make mischief with. I've not tried flax oil but I used to make muffins for breakfast with the meal. Must try them again. Have a good weekend  
21 Aug 11 by member: flaxseed
Thanks Flaxseed ... I did look up his name on facebook but didn't send him a message. You are probably right. It won't make me feel better and it will give him something to make mischief with. It's unfortunate ... but I need to put it back away. 
21 Aug 11 by member: madaboutmoose
Hi Carol! If you don't have any trouble doing two minutes at the hardest level, then it is not hard enough. To get the intensity you're looking for in an interval training, you will have to vary your speed. push as fast as you can for 30 seconds, go slower the next minute etc... That's what we were doing on the rower at Crossfit. We would set the machine on a medium resistance and vary our speed. I've never used an elliptical so I don't know if you can do that... 
21 Aug 11 by member: jessyline
Hey - I just messaged you on skype, but your not on, and I don't know if it is going to go through.... We have to set up a time to chat! 
21 Aug 11 by member: MomofTwoGirls
I too tried to Skype you yesterday afternoon, but your status said you were away... 
21 Aug 11 by member: jessyline
arghh!!! I'm not signed in right now and I need to go cook breakfast ... 
21 Aug 11 by member: madaboutmoose
Hi, Carol! I don't know - I think the pain never goes away but we build up protection against it if we are focused on healing ourselves. Sorry to hear you are in pain this weekend but treat yourself right because you deserve it! 
21 Aug 11 by member: abbadabba
so Anne ... I did the 2 minute intervals this morning and just tried to go as fast as I could during the "hard" intervals and really eased up on the alternate intervals. I did sweat ... the elliptical is sort of like a treadmill except your feet never leave the "pedals." You can go faster ... which I would imagine will increase the intensity. Mom has a stationary bike upstairs ... I might give that a try as well. Mix it up a bit? 
21 Aug 11 by member: madaboutmoose

     
 

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