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The last week has been very, very rough. I've slipped yet again into a depressive episode. There is a commercial on TV that explains this feeling to the "T"... who does depression hurt? everyone, where does depression hurt? everywhere! What an aweful feeling, specially after being so positive and feeling so good about everything. Things went from brightness to being plunged into a dark hole. With this came the need for all my comfort foods, which when things are going okay I can eat in moderation, but during one of these "episodes (for lack of a better word)" all I want to do is eat high fat, high carbs, high sugar and salt, and sleep! I eat till I feel like I am going to throw up, and although I am so emotionally tired I end up not being able to sleep.
Okay I know I have battled this before and have come out the other side with little damage to the waistline, but this time I am too tired to care. It's actually bad enough that the only exercise I have been getting on a regular basis is my walk to and from work.
This is not fair at all, I take my medication everyday and I try to work through it.. only to have nothing work!
Unfortunately the more emotionally tired I become, I also in all honesty become a fat, lazy slob, who cries easily and then gets angry at everything because I feel like a fat, lazy slob.
Damn thought writing about it would make me feel better, but not even this helped.
"stuff happens", just have to get through another day the best I can.. time to slip into survival mode :(
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