restlesshope's Journal, 17 January 2011

Nothing easy about self-evaluation. Finding the triggers, like knowing your emotions are playing havoc w/ your will - is only the first step. Sooner or later you will find the strength to deal with your emotions. Sometimes it's needing to walk in forgiveness to others, things that have happened in our lives that we need to let go of, or even just simple worry, or fear...will lead our emotions down a path of being stirred. Once the process starts, it can take days or weeks to feel like you have shaken it. The best thing I have found for me, was to spend time reading. When I felt upset about something - I would google it...and find articles about 'sibling issues' or 'marital support' or 'financial strategies' etc. I would start to take some of the fear out of it...and replace it with my own version of a plan. Something I could take ACTION on. I no longer felt out of control. I was able to breath deeply again and know that although nothing was perfect...I could see my way clear to keeping my goals in front of me for TODAY. And if I had to take it ONE day at a time...then so be it. As I journaled in my personal journal here at home, I would go back and read about the things I discussed w/myself. I could see where I needed to let go of past hurts. Where I needed to change how I responded to certain situations. I could see a lot of patterns and it made it easier to begin to find ways to change things. I became my own focus. Instead of food. And that's when it really all began to fall into place. Thinking of you today...and praying for you too! Much Love. 

jsfantome you always ,like stef seem to have the right advise when i need it. i have not tried personal journaling in awhile and so have not had the objectivity that i am looking for i am going to try that and start today have been trying music and walking but it has not been working when the stressors become to high. i cant see in the moment and leave my self nothing tangable to work with when i do not journal will try that next time. it may not stop the eating but it will give me insite on the repair that i will need. and give me a focus while i am upset other than the frig. thanks! and again thank you for sticking around and helping us all get to where you are you have so much information and understanding ... just ....thanks... 

you're so welcome! I've been there...an emotional disaster case for the record books! And finding my issues, defining them...being willing to participate in CHANGING them... it was a lot of effort. But OH SO WORTH IT! And YOU are WORTH IT! No one eats out of control for no reason at all. But in the end I found facing my 'pain' about certain issues not only brought about emotional healing regarding that issue, but it allowed me to move on so that the next time it came up in my life, it no longer triggered the desire to comfort those emotions with food. Food was just not an option in my brain anymore. If I was going to be aware of being upset...then I was going to OWN IT! Yell, Scream, Cry, Pray, Read, Walk, Take a Bubble Bath, Go to the Beach, Whatever...but food was no longer an option. Food was planned out, and decided upon months ago for my body's overall health...and that was a non-negotiable. So I had to find NEW ways to deal with whatever I was dealing with. Exercise became my friend. It was a distraction. I liked the workout. I liked the way it made me feel. Gave me time to think. Would listen to Worship Music on my mp3 and it uplifted me, made me feel strong, and gave me just enough time away from my own thoughts to re-center myself and come back to reality able to face my 'stuff'. It's been a long journey...and yours will be too. And it's easy to get tired, and lose our focus. But don't ever GIVE UP...and you're halfway home! 

We are all here for you, and understand where you are at and where you are coming for. Most of us, especially women I think, are emotional eaters which is why we put on pounds in the first place. I hope the jounralling helps you. Check out Stef's post in ASM today and her journal entry, it may help you too. Good luck.