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All is well! Having met my initial big goal (75lb loss) i decided to reset my next goal - Onderland. WOE is great! Since i am still shrinking consistently, I am making trips to Goodwill for smaller sizes - not wanting to pay retail cost for clothes I will wear for only several mos. Was excited to see that - depending on the cut of the garment, I have left "the plus sizes" - and, man that's a great feeling! Still loving my WOE! Still maintaining my never-ever-cheat personal standards - and that is a great feeling, too. I have the tenacity of a bulldog and I never give-in, give-out, or give-up. My motivation and resolve for clean eating stays high.
A recent low point for me was reading a precious friend's post - seeing where she "gave away all the fat clothes" - and understanding that she was referring to her clothes sizes that she wore when she was the size I am right now. That low, sinking feeling crept over me - that I am still very much "fat" even though I have lost 83 lbs.....and what a long way i still have yet to go. :( Because I am a firm believer in controlling my thoughts - instead if allowing them to control me, I let that last for about an hour and then I changed my thoughts. I reminded myself that *my* fat clothes could have held two small people between their seams....and those clothes are ginormous "drapes" on me and are now folded and boxed, prepped for donation. I reminded myself that I am active - I can run up the stairs and my joints never hurt, burdened by excess weight. I told myself I have a new lease on life and i never more suffer with bothersome, ugly, swelling and discoloration of feet/ankles as I had in the past. I reminded myself that I daily make healthy choices and hormone imbalances and depression never rule my life. I encouraged myself repeating comments I have heard, monitoring my self-talk -- "You look so young - just as you did in college days". I realize that I can be pitiful or powerful - - but not both. I choose powerful. I know that I can get down on myself and make excuses or I can make progress - - but not both. I choose progress. I am focus-forward.
On other news, my job and my home buisiness continue to do well. After being totally self-employed for 11 yrs it is tough working a traditional job alongside my business demands....but with Jim planting the new church we desperately needed my other job to carry us for the insurance. Today marks my 1 yr anniversary with the second job, which fortunately, also allows me to work at home. Being at home also helps me to consistently stay on my eating plan and I love creating new, healthy, low carb options. And also by being at home working, i don't have to spend a fortune on smaller sized career gear to keep up with my shrinking body. In fact, I even get to work in PJs if I want to! In short, I am very content. Very thankful to God for His blessings and for His help in keepimg me motivated to change my life.
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