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bethinfriend's Journal

 
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09 January 2017

bad news
I haven't been watching what I ate earlier so I think I gained a few pounds here and there :(
super sad
so here's what happened .
I was sick for a few days ( still recovering ) just flu , nothing major
but I felt really weak and I started to eat a lot sleep a lot to try to recover faster...
that result in me getting fat really really quick !
I would suggest people who live in norCal or soCal or just Cal in general to wear really warm cloth when you go out these days , i don't know if its just raining season or what was going on , but it has been raining like almost every single day here ( where I live ). Always always bring an umbrella or wear a rain suit !

Today I looked at myself in the mirror and I don't recognize who I am , my face is 2X bigger than before ...lol
because I been eating dinner ....like ...
for 5 days , and it's not just dinner..it's korean bbq ...
:(


oh no!!!!

I'm currently studying to become a web developer but I don't know what my future is gonna be ~ but I'll focus on studying and as for diet ...I need to go buy a scale! seriously ..I moved from one city to another to study and I do not have a scale anymore ....this is bad because I just let myself go , let myself eat anything I want ( I had fat pork , cup noodles, cake, bread with wipe cream ......fml)

so step 1
GET A SCALE
step 2
throw away the left over korean bbq stuff from my fridge
step 3
no dinner , no dinner , no dinner , no dinner
step 4
weight myself everyday !every single day

ttyl forum

28 December 2016

it's been a long time since I last weight in ~
I didn't weight myself today ~
I got some people inbox me asking me how I manage to loose weight so fast in such a
short period of time

its' just a few steps
1. throw away all the really fat food ( fried food, greasy food , food with a lot of calories, food with high sugar content ) in your fridge , if you want , donate them to a charity of some kind , or give it to the people who live on the street.
2. put only healthy food in your fridge , like veggies, organic food, lean meat ( chicken breast etc) , low calorie food etc...
3. get a steamer ....seriously get a food steamer , I been using food steamer for the past so many days ( I can't remember how many days ) but I been using it a lot, I don't cook food with much cooking oil now , and steam your food is just a really healthy way of cooking. sprinkle some sea salt on your steamed veggie or meat , it's as simple as that . Taste wise it's not the best taste , but it's just a low calorie and healthy way of living.
4. don't eat in a restaurant , you can't control calories when you eat in a restaurant ..you don't know what they put in their dish ..how much oil , how much sugar ..and plus , it's so expensive to eat in a restaurant , even if you eat in McDonald everyday , your expense accumulates ~and overall you are looking at spending a few hundred dollars on food every month minimum .
*******optional : I really really like sprouts personally , I go there almost everyday. Sprouts is really a high quality supermarket , their food is healthy and fresh ,and most importantly their groceries are pretty low price. I know a lot of you go to whole food, but for me I really can't afford to go to whole food everyday , so sprouts is like my substitute for whole food. like yesterday , I went there to get a package of lean chicken breast ($2.40) and an avocado (70cent / each) , I have some oranges at home so seriously I can have my everyday healthy living at just around $5 a day on food .For one month that's only like $150 dollars on food and I'm not eating unhealthy fast food at all . I won't gain a ton of weight by eating stuff like this ~ so give it a try
5. I got this treadmill machine from amazon~It is so amazing , my legs are thinner by just walking on it everyday ,and I get to watch tv while I'm on the treadmill because I set it right infront of my TV . You don't have to get one if you already have a gym membership , I dont really have a gym membership and I don't want to spend the money so I just got a treadmill. ( I know my money will go to waste because I rarely go to the gym , so for me getting a gym membership is a waste of money :( )

little update about my life .
I got into a program that teaches software engineering class
before the program starts I'm just doing a lot of the coding exercises on my own
which is actually really fun ~
for holiday , I traveled to another city to visit my family
We had a fantastic christmas eve dinner together ^^-b
everything seems like going to the right direction right now ~
for boys , I don't know about boys...I used to think oh I'm fat , nobody wants to date me
right now I think , if a guy likes me, he better accept who I am , or else, I don't think he likes me as me ..and I don't think I want to date a really shallow guy ~so I'm not gonna worry about getting a boyfriend right now , just gonna focus on my diet and on my study ~
Another thing is I been really involved with my church activities and my fellowship group, I find church as a good resource for mental support. Especially when I'm on diet, people in my fellowship are really nice to me , they are less judgmental, and I feel really peaceful when I'm there . Fat secret is also a really really good place if you need mental support , people have up and downs , when I have down times, I find there's a lot of lovely people on fat secret who actually care about me . People get super upset when they gain weight I totally understand that , I gained some weight loss some weight , but we are in this together ~ just get up and keep going !^^

hope you all have a good holiday

17 December 2016

hey guys ~
I feel so proud of myself
yesterday I went to dinner meet up with my church fellowship group
they ordered fried food I didn't eat
I asked our fellowship leader if it was okay if I just go there to catch up with them and no eat the food there because i'm on diet, and she said okay :D
I had fun chatting with fellowship friends at the dinner ~
today I'm just cooking meal with my lovely food steamer.
on the first layer , I put some raw oyster , raw quail egg and salted veggies
on the second layer I put some Konnyaku noodle ( 10 calories only )

if you guys haven't tried Konnyaku noodle (if you are interested do a google search on this )
you should definitely give it a try !
it is really really low calorie food , and you can use this to substitute for real noodle~
it taste like jelly noodle ( I don't know what that is , but just a combination of jelly + noodle taste if you know what i mean :D )
but make sure don't eat this too often , because you may get food poisoned if you eat it often .
so maybe like once a week ? only when you really really wanna eat noodle , use this as substitute.
or just do a zucchini noodle with Italian zucchini .

I weight myself this morning,I am happy.
A few days ago I started binging and I gained a few pounds , right now since i'm on strict calorie control again, i weight 165 pounds , still weigh more than I used to be , but I am in the process of recovering so it's all good!

effort=success

ttyl

16 December 2016

Hello ~
I'm back on track ! Today I had a cup of coffee , 1 taste of steamed veggie and meat ( extremely small portion, like 1 bite )
I'm sorry guys but this eat normal and control yourself thing doesn't work for me ,for me it's either control myself extremely, or loose control all at once and binge. Yes , failure is not an option! So , I am determined to make it right this time.

I'm a warrior , so 300 calories a day + 1 hours workout + vitamins is what I will do .
I will regain control and I will not let anything affect me . I still want to thank those people who commented on my journal with good intentions . Thank you , but the longer I try to eat normal , the longer I suffer from low self esteem , the higher potential for me to binge, so I will just do it the "most people don't understand you or support you because you are seriously under eating and you have an unhealthy diet way"

another update about my diet journal is that I bought this nice food steamer from amazon ~
It's around $19 dollars, it is just awesome!
I still try to eat because I don't want to starve to death before I complete my mission.
I'm just not gonna eat the normal people portion every meal , and I'm not gonna eat every meal ..

So back to this steamer , I put veggies , meat in the steamer , set the timer , and it automatically steams my food ..
I don't put any oil on the food , I only put maybe a sprinkle of sea salt ( If I feel like it )on top of my food and
no other seasoning .

I try to not use any frying pan to cook food , steamer feels like the only kitchen appliance that helps minimize the calorie intake from cooking process.

https://www.google.com/search?q=amazon+food+steamer&client=safari&rls=en&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi_p57I7fnQAhUK9GMKHTwdACwQ_AUICSgC&biw=831&bih=625&dpr=2

this is the one I bought , not sure if you guys can see. or maybe if you just search "food steamer " on amazon.
I have a dinner meet up tonight I am still deciding whether or not to attend the meeting.
Because it may be awkward if I go there and say , hey I don't wanna eat , can I just chat and don't eat anything?
It's the last meet up for my church fellowship group so I don't wanna miss it, but I just can't eat dinner.
Maybe I'll ask my fellowship friend about her opinion , whether I should go there or not :(

Again , thank you for commenting on my journal , I read every comment , and sometimes I feel really depress your support really help me through this battle.

I hope everyone is doing well , christmas is coming , and there's chance that we'll eat big holiday meal , I just hope we all keep our faith and be able to control ourselves .

16 December 2016

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