RavenIllusion's Journal

Okay so it's been a while. I had some setbacks in my plan. I also spent about 3 weeks without my computer, and I hate posting from the app. I have been trying to live healthy and for the most part have been successful, but on the exercise front I fell and busted up my knee a week after my last post and it is still messed up over a month later. I am awaiting an MRI to find out what is really going on with it. It just seems like when things start going my way the world crashes down on me and Fs everything up.

My weight has been up and down, but seems to has stabilized at around 382ish so I thought it was time to come back and get the support I so desperately need.

Okay so I haven't been around in a few weeks, but life has gotten in the way of a lot of things right now. This is the final tally of the Holiday weight gain, 30lbs in total, which is horrible since I don't even celebrate the winter holidays. It was actually higher but I have managed to lose about 8lbs in the past week and a half.
I have set a new goal for myself, and that is to lose 60lbs, in the next six months which means my goal weight is 320, I figure that 10lbs a month is doable.
I have set some goals for myself this year:

1. Shop smarter: I need to learn how to shop in low-end grocery store that I have access to and take advantage of the trips to regular stores like Publix that I get once a monthish.
2. Remember that I have "Good Days" and "Bad Days": Living life with fibromyalgia is a delicate balancing act. If want an idea of it, read "Spoon Theory" . and I need to remember that there are day where I need to focus on me and not on pushing myself beyond my limits.
3. Focus on "Good Days": They may be few and far between but when I have them I need to take advantage of my good and use them, I need to take that walk or do that cardio video.
4. Eat Breakfast within 45 minutes of getting up: I know that 30 minutes is optimal, but I tried and I just can't keep food on my stomach that soon after getting up.
5. Do something about my binge eating: This on involves a doctor and I am going to talk to mine about prescribing something for my binge eating.
6. Take time for me: This one may sound selfish, but I need to focus on me and stop worrying about the goings on of the people around me. Sometimes I get so embroiled in issues with my roommates lives that my stress levels get sent through the roof and then I want to eat. I have no family and only one close friend to worry about, so I need to worry about me and my health.

Again it makes me feel great just know I can come here when I am stressed and get the support I need. Thanks, and Happy New Year everyone.

I'm back, and life hasn't gone the way I was hoping it would go, and I have gained nearly 20lbs over the last few months mostly due to emotional and binge eating, but I have taken a stand and decided that even under my less than optimal living conditions. I know that I have no one to blame but myself for the weight gain and I am going to have to work with what I got to change it. I love the support that I get from everyone here to help me through the ups and downs. I am looking forward to being back.

I have made a hard decision when it comes to my weight and that it that I am putting it on hold. I am just going to try to maintain my current weight for the time being. I am doing this because my current situation is just not conducive to weight loss. This is not going to be for a long time, just a few months and my living situation will change, which will change my financial situation, which will put me in a better place overall. Once I am moved and stable I will resume my journey to lose weight, so don't be surprised it you don't see me around here that much. Thanks to everyone who has supported me here, I am very grateful for all the love you have given and will be back soon.

Two pounds up, but I'm not mad. I consider this a normal fluctuation based on what I ate this week, and considering that this week consisted of subs, pizza, and Chinese food I am actually surprised that it was only two pounds, but then again I have been exercising this week so I think I balanced things out. I still feel like I am on track and I still feel in control so I am happy.