apantoja's Journal, 03 May 2018

Please don't lose hope or give up. I have been in your shoes so many times over the years. I feel like I know how you must be feeling. A few things I have gathered looking back: 1) There is life beyond the "need to feel full". For me it was replaced by the feeling from intense physical activity. However, I will slip up and eat an ENTIRE BOX of cookies and I can't stop myself. Fasting has helped me with this, but sticking to any diet will help with this. 2) You CAN lose the weight. I read your bio and I wanted to get the gastric surgery too but I would need to gain an extra 20 pounds to qualify. But, I simply could not lose the weight. For me fasting was my answer (it removes hunger) but the gastric surgery will of course do the same thing (reduce calories you consume). Whatever you decide to do you will find something that WILL work. 3) Losing weight does not bring happiness. This may seem like a bad one, but actually it is a good one. Right now we can be very grateful for the health we have, our family and friends, our home, our life. In the end losing weight is like getting our hair done, simply an improvement in our life :) 

adebwebserver thanks for your comments. They are indeed encouraging. When I think about doing this for the rest of the year before I managed to go up to 1500 calories, I feel like I would have to climb the Everest with little oxygen. It is been almost 2 weeks since I started and it feels like 2 months. I guess I have to reconsider my relationship with food. The bariatric clinic told me that if I go below BMI 29 they won't insert the balloon as it will prove that I can loose weight witouth it. Fair enough. For now I will carry on as far as I can, I have around 2 months to decide if to try again the gastric balloon. I admire your dedication, you are definitely more brave than me. I'll be following and supporting you. 

Jesus Christ! 600-800 kcal a day.. put your body on emergency mode and loose nothing! It will give away nothing!!! Do 1200-1400 kcal a day, quality calories, not junk, with struggle and sacrifice, you feel happy and weight will easily melt.. 

*without struggle 

@apantoja - Now that we are friends :) Can I grab you by the shoulders and shake you a bit to make you get a little perspective. You were 189 on April 22nd and then you were 183 on April 30th. Ok let's look at this. You lost 6 pounds in basically a week! I could not do that even when I was only drinking water while fasting! That is insane results! So yeah the scale isn't gonna act that way all the time. Perhaps the clinic is correct and you should simply stay on your diet because you're really doing great? :) :)