Sharons Victory's Journal, 22 March 2018

ugh I can't believe I slipped up today!!!!!

All the not eating carbs...they had a potluck at work and I decided to be more lenient with my carb intake...had some chili that has very light beans and some nacho cheese so wasn't as bad as everybody else but it was cheating for me. Then something SNAPPED!!! It was like my inner carb gremlin was released! lol...funny but not funny...ugh!!!

I even was going to go pig out on cake but they packed it away thank God!!!

But I just ate three red vines and two peppermints and was thinking about getting a slice of Safeway chocolate cake after work but now that I've breathed and thought about that I'm doing I decided I wont do that...and might even try to skip dinner if I'm not that hungry tonight from all my eating this afternoon.

I noticed I've been losing way less this month and that I need to step it up...I'm struggling with depression lately and not drinking and all the new feelings I'm having to actually FEEL instead of drink away...it's so so hard!!! Without alcohol food definitely feels like a second option for coping...UGH

Diet Calendar Entry for 22 March 2018:
2165 kcal Fat: 133.15g | Prot: 99.41g | Carb: 144.99g.   Breakfast: Food Club Large Egg, Kirkland Signature Natural Psyllium Fiber, Heavy Cream. Lunch: Wish-Bone Ranch Dressing, Wal-Mart Iceberg Salad, Wendy's Chili (Large), Que Bueno Nacho Cheese Sauce. Dinner: Heavy Cream. Snacks/Other: Red Vines Original Red Twists, Winn-Dixie Peppermint Candy, Kirkland Signature Natural Psyllium Fiber. more...

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Comments 
dont be yourself up! 
22 Mar 18 by member: marshakanady
beat sorry 
22 Mar 18 by member: marshakanady
Hate it when the carb gremlins get wet! Those little demons multiply & wreak havoc in our lives. Best wishes killing them off!  
22 Mar 18 by member: MillaLite
I'm proud of you for not drinking! Your post made me laugh when you wrote that they had taken the cake away! 
22 Mar 18 by member: Charlotte_15
With carbs...sometimes the first one is like pulling the first thread of a tapestry...it all can come unraveled very quickly.  
22 Mar 18 by member: sam1955
Wow, I struggle with drinking as well so I feel comforted to see someone I can relate to so soon after joining. Not that this is good, I wouldn't wish it on anyone, but it's been something I've mostly hidden. 
22 Mar 18 by member: criticalhit
I just give in and start from zero!! Like AA. I also make sure I burn off as much as I can that day and at least the next two. It may help for next time the gremlins show up. 
22 Mar 18 by member: Dare2LiveDelicious
We are all haunted by our demons, they are a real force. I think for people like us, food & drink will always be a battle ground. Hang in there my friend. You are doing great. I know you can do this! 
22 Mar 18 by member: glen
very good. good choice with the drinking. i can definetly relate. but feeling is not always a bad thing. believe it that crying releases stress. no stress equals no weight .. so ur doing great. a little slip once in a while is not somepthing u punish urself for. enjoy the moment and keep going. smile. really, SMILE! now go find some keto desserts, make it and enjoy. that helped my slump yesterday.. have fun 
22 Mar 18 by member: poison1vy
I have a family full of alcoholics so I get the drinking. I have a tendency to want to drink away my ‘pain’ and depression. I’ve kept away from alcohol a lot in my life after my year or so of partying. Now I stick to a couple drinks a year. Amaredo sours are my fav but I can drink them like coke and it takes 10+ from a bar to feel it or 3 stiff ones at home. I choose at home usually around my birthday. I keep it to a couple beers in the summer and occasionally 1-2 when I need help sleeping. It actually makes depression worse I’m told. Good job on skipping the cake! Dislike cake but I have issues with candy bars. Love most of them lol. I’m still gaining even though I’ve started using this app, have limited calories to about 1200 a day and workout and burn 200-400 calories daily. I can’t wait to see some results as I’ve been at this for weeks now. 
22 Mar 18 by member: peeperjj
Sometimes a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do. The sun will rise tomorrow. 
22 Mar 18 by member: slimays
I have to remember that I am in it for the long haul, the little bumps (or gremlins) are just that. I have to remember to eat enough as well, when I try not to eat it makes the cravings worse. and then I can justify pretty much anything. I have found some no carb chocolate and low carb cookies that help satisfy the urge when I get it but I stick to the serving size or amount of carbs that fit my plan for the day if it is less that the serving amount. you are doing great so pick yourself up and stay the course - I wish you all the best on this adventure.  
22 Mar 18 by member: tahoebrun
Sharon just remember you are worth the fight. I am a non practicing alcoholic and if I slip up and drink I will eat everything in the house. Besides the cravings last for days afterwards. It seems like starting all over again. Keep an eye toward the you, you want to be. Sorry for the depression. Got any good and close friends you can bend their ear? Pulling for you. 
22 Mar 18 by member: adamevegod1
Relax - I was gonna say something funny but then you got serious - you could be holding on to tight to this / look where and how far you've come - Be proud and know you'll hit bumps - we all do - I want to eat bread with everything but have replaced that - don't let guilt get you down - we are human - diet soda my vice , my one thing I can have , that is a later discussion - you want something sweet incorporate whipped cream almonds dark chocolate blueberries banana just to name a few things into your diet - I drink bud select for my alcohol , sparingly -, YOU GOT THIS - Now calm down , and relax , promise?  
22 Mar 18 by member: johnwentzville
I’m in Cali too- Bay Area! Hang in there and take one day at a time 
22 Mar 18 by member: mishy08
The carb monster is a real thing. I get the same cravings when I have some simple carbs. I want to eat everything in sight! Cold turkey works the best for me! 
22 Mar 18 by member: Draglist
Carb gremlin!! Hahaha it is real! I have to stay away from treats/baked goods/sugar or I don’t want to stop either. Be gentle on yourself—you are doing so well and there a lot of things you’re adjusting to. I don’t drink but I can imagine having an escape would be comforting—but in the long run dealing with what you are feeling will be more healthy and productive. Hugs to you! 
23 Mar 18 by member: momma6224
Sorry to hear of your struggles. It is important not to beat yourself up so much as it only exacerbates the feelings of guilt and adds to your struggle. It is important to know that we all have struggles, trials, tribulations, in our lives and to that regard you are never alone, although you may feel like it. WE are all here to help you through things ! No one is perfect...despite what some persons may think....As there is always one in a crowd. .....However, we know you have the tenacity inside to achieve your goals, as you've said so yourself from your prior experience....It is important to remember " When you fall, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep going". As for your slip on carbs---its okay ---it was a mistake--now move on and try again.... For as long as I could remember I have had a sweet tooth and craved my sweets from time to time. What I am re-learning is how to slow or prevent the ravenous cravings of the EVIL carbs (sweets/Sugary drinks). Although it may be contrary to the KETO diet ---for which there is nothing wrong ---Carbs are okay to have as long they are GOOD carbs and eaten in moderation.....The goods carbs being vegetables and some fruits in moderation which will provide raw sugars with the sweet sensation for taste (natural sugars from fruit), while the vegetables will provide the ability to satiate and give you the sense of feeling full. Vegetables can be eaten at meals or snack times ----but it is important not to add a lot of creams, or cheeses, or thick dressings, for added taste. While they are good from time to time these should be limited. Hey ----I am learning too, everyday is a lesson, and every meal is a new opportunity to build upon a weakness or turn things into a strength....Together, along with the rest of the FS community can teach each other as time goes on what may work for us and what may not. I have learned rapidly that adjustments may need to made from time to time as the body learns to adapt or reject certain foods. The way to view things is not as a DIET but rather a LIFESTYLE CHANGE..... KETO, PALEO, ATKINS, and other so called diets are guidelines which can be modified to suit your body's need in order to achieve your goals. But one underlying rule to all of them is EVERYTHING IN MODERATION !!!! NOW GO GET TIGER, I HAVE FAITH IN YOU !!!!! YOU NEED TO BELIEVE IN YOURSELF !!!!! Ignore Naysayers as they will undoubtedly add to frustration and stress.....THIS IS FOR YOU--NOT THEM.....YOU KNOW HOW AND WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE !!!!  
23 Mar 18 by member: wright2018

     
 

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