GWMcolorado's own "Fatkins" diet
For those of you who might be wondering I am actually no stranger to the whole diet and exercise roller coaster. As a young gay man I learned early on that "EWWWW No Fats, Femmes, or Asians" wasn't just a thing roid-ragey douchebags said to be caddy. There was indeed a cultural expectation for gay men to be lean and "masculine" (and discriminatory, but that is for another essay).
I was a child of the 70's and 80's. Growing up in a small town in Alaska we did not eat bean sprouts and arugula salad with skinless grilled chicken breast for dinner. It was meat and potatoes, mom's famous tuna noodle casserole, or cheesey spaghetti. "Salad" was of the: Potato, tuna, or chicken variety. And "dining out" usually entailed yelling at an order box. I don't blame my parents; no one taught them about carbs, or that children don't need to finish everything on their plates whether or not they are still hungry. There were starving children in Africa after all. Also no one could have foreseen that kids would be spending more and more time in front of the TV, Nintendo, and eventually the internet than playing outside.
It wasn't until much later when I went away to college that I discovered I was in fact "fat". I vividly remember the moment I learned I was a disgusting blob. I was on a date with a young blond twinky type guy from town. A date which came to an abrupt end in the middle of drinks when he said, "Ok, sorry, I'm gonna go. I was hoping for someone with abs." I was of course humiliated and speechless. I didn't go on another date that semester. Finals came and went and I returned home to Ketchikan Alaska for the summer.
I took a job with the US Forest Service building trails and maintaining remote cabins. It was hard work and by virtue of the fact that I was hiking 10 hours a day 5 days a week I did start to lose a bit of weight. Eventually that weight loss started to taper off. It was about this time I started noticing a curious little book making the rounds amongst the church ladies a my local congregation. The book? "Dr. Atkins Diet Revolution". I didn't know anything about it so I asked my mom if she had heard of it. She mentioned that my aunt Connie had been trying the Atkins diet for a few months and had lost some weight. My mom didn't see how that was possible. Eggs and bacon for breakfast? Cheeseburger patties for dinner? No pasta or even whole grain bread? IMPOSSIBLE! There is so much fat!
But, my mom said she would consider trying the diet herself if I did it first and could prove I lost weight on it. SO I went to the bookstore and purchased my own copy and followed the diet plan in detail. The pounds literally flew right off as the saying goes. I stuck with Atkins through the fall semester. When I left I weighed 235lbs. When I returned for Thanksgiving I was a svelt 200lbs. My family was impressed at my weight loss and my self-discipline during the feast. Turkey, ham, halibut (my Alaskan family tradition), broccoli salad, a LITTLE bit of green bean casserole (gotta have that) and all the vegetables from the crudite I could eat. I skipped the Egg Nog, hot chocolate, and pre-Christmas cookies. I did indulge myself with a small slice of pumpkin pie with sugar free cool whip.
I eventually reached my goal weight of 190lbs and dialed back the "Atkin's Nazi" aspect of my personality. I had lost the weight but I had GAINED self-confidence. I soon became "Mr. Popular" at least as far as the local gay community was concerned. "Manwhore" my friends would call me (that was actually a myth but I did nothing to discourage the rumors). Eventually I would meet the man who became my life-partner and we would settle down to domestic life together.
Domestic life had unintended consequences for a person like me. We discovered a mutual obsession with "The World of Warcraft" and ordering Dominos pizza online. I eventually formed the habit of keeping a six pack (and later 12 pack) of beer in a cooler by my computer on raid nights. Online raids are just more fun if everyone is drinking and joking around after all. ALL aspects of my previous devotion to the Atkin's diet were long forgotten; which brings me to today. I'm 254lbs. According to the BMI I am Obese. It is time for a change in my life. I'm not saying that Atkins is the way I'm going to go this time, there are plenty of other diet plans that work just fine if properly followed.