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I feel a little bit like a baby today, didya ever see a baby when he takes his first steps and he KNOWS he's in charge, and he just flippin' BEAMS from ear to ear? Yeah, that's what I look like today, a big ol' 5 ft 2 inch 50 yr old baby, who just found out she could JOG!! I can jog, ya'll!!! ME!!! I'm part of the club now!
I was so jealous of my husband, just jogging his heart out on the treadmill, sweating, and burning those kcals and dropping weight so easily, because, also, HE'S A MALE, but whatever, he was making me sick, he dropped down to high-school weight in two months ARRRGGGHHH!!! I can't make the scales budge, oh sure, I'm building muscle, but I'm also stuffing a lot of sugar into my face... especially the evenings.... He goes to work and he's away from the kitchen. I can't keep myself out of the kitchen, plus the kids need to eat, and they love the goodies, I'm constantly immersed in goodies!!
But today, my daughter had a dr. appointment, and I had some time to kill. It was a beautiful sunny crisp windy spring day, I was in my favorite quaint little town, and I decided to take a brisk walk, get some of my cardio out of the way... I had my gym clothes and shoes on, and a "regulation" jogging jacket with pockets, so I really felt like... I might actually be able to pass, I might look a little bit like an athletic-type person... Me!
I set out on the sidewalk at a brisk walking pace... I glanced around sheepishly... what if I tried to jog a little? But what if I could only run a tenth of a mile and then fail? But what if I didn't fail? What if I look silly? What if my ankles gave out and I got that sharp stupid pain and I failed? But what if they didn't? What if I got a cramp? What if I didn't? What if someone drove past and honked and yelled "Give it up, lard butt!" What if I passed REAL runners, and what if they laughed at the poser? What if I run like a girl? Actually, I AM a girl, and a feminist, so that's not an insult, and should never be an insult. But what if I did something weird with my hands, or what if I stumbled? What if my ear started hurting? And then that very harsh judge in my head looped back around to the most pressing question, what if could only make it a tenth of a mile, and what if I find out that truth about myself, that I CAN'T jog...
But then something happened. All the accumulated FIRSTS from the past year came flooding back to me, I walked a 5k with my friend, I ran/walked a 5 mile mud-run, joined the gym and stuck with it for 3 months so far, used kettlebells, tried a zumba class, took yoga classes, did calisthenics, actually used a hotel fitness room on vacation, bought a bike rack and used it a couple times already, got serious shoes that fit really well and had gel soles and high ratings, joined fatsecret and got real for the first time about what I was actually eating, learned to make hummus, and kefir, and healthy homemade granola bars for the kids... I think it all just came to a head and I felt like, what's one more thing, at this point? I didn't think I could do most of those other things, and I did, why can't I at least try jogging?
So I started these funny little timid jogging steps.. and then I committed to it... and I made it 2 blocks... and I thought I was gonna die! My lungs were like, HEY, what the hell are you doing? I said, I'm jogging! They said, you don't jog. We're gonna quit. I said, no kidding, I want to quit too! But for whatever reason, I didn't. I jogged for 10 minutes, circled around 3 blocks, and through a lovely little green park WITH BIRDS flitting about, and oh how I longed to see a squirrel... no squirrel today, but I trudged on... I noticed 3 houses for sale, in this cute little town, I trudged on... I got back to the doctor's parking lot, finished strong, like I had run the friggin Boston Marathon! 10 minutes! I think I could've run longer too, but was happy with that for now. Grinning like a fool! I kept moving at that point, to keep the metabolism going, and decided to walk the whole loop again. It was one of the happiest walks of my life! I felt exactly like Bob Wiley:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YrbY4hsNh64
Diet Calendar Entries for 17 April 2014:
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1243 kcal
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Fat: 51.04g | Prot: 79.56g | Carb: 118.40g.
Breakfast: Fresh Ham, Egg, Cantaloupe Melons, Cascadian Farm Organic Crunchy Granola Bars - Oats & Honey. Lunch: Morey's Imitation Crab, Cooked or Sauteed Mature Onions (Fat Added in Cooking), Yam (Without Salt, Drained, Cooked, Boiled, Baked), Cooked Red Cabbage, Cooked Red Peppers, Cooked Broccoli (Fat Not Added in Cooking). Dinner: Roasted Broiled or Baked Chicken Breast. Snacks/Other: Keebler Chips Deluxe Cookies Chocolate Peanut Butter, Hershey's Butterscotch Chips, Bob's Red Mill Natural Granola, Breyers All Natural Strawberry Ice Cream, Tootsie Roll Frooties. more...
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1905 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Shopping - 30 minutes, Walking (exercise) - 3.5/mph - 20 minutes, Running (jogging) - 5/mph - 10 minutes, Exercise machine (moderate) - 40 minutes, Housework - 2 hours, Sleeping - 8 hours, Resting - 12 hours and 20 minutes. more...
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