SaintViper's Journal, 20 December 2010

Carbs have been high lately. I wonder if I should find some lower carb foods particularly for breakfast. 

I see that you are a "featured member" on the front page of FatSecret today. Don't you feel special??? LOL! 

Yesterday must have been an off day for everyone. Saw 204.8 on the scale Sunday morning, but forgot to record and then 207 this morning. I did eat a lot yesterday though. Glad to see your back, I hope you had a good little vacay. 

ugh. there are days where I can decide to binge and be ok with it, and enjoy it and come out feeling ok in the end. Yesterday....I think I was trying to commit suicide by food or something. I also became VERY agitate and irritable and upset. Was I eating BECAUSE I was feeling that way? Was I feeling that way BECAUSE I was eating? I have no idea but I was throwing things by bedtime. Actually, now that I think about it...I was having a totally manic day all around. Cuz I was cleaning and baking and decorating and all of those things and feeling VERY overwhelmed. So instead of getting alot done I became extremely focused on getting small things done REALLY well. Like I spent 2 hours hand scrubbing EVERY surface in the tiny little bathroom with bleach. I guess I should have just gone for a walk/run/ski....or taken a pill. :-/ 

Vacation was great. More of an extra long weekend. The kids have been taking swim lessons, so they were a lot more comfortable in the water than last time. Ate at the crummy hotel restaurant though. Another terrible Caesar salad. You'd think the brown slimy lettuce would stick out when they make it. 

'Featured' members are completely random. I've seen both of you on there as well.  

d'OH!! I knew they were random, I was just giving you a bad time. Ugh, slimy lettuce should be outlawed.  

Gross. Just the image alone makes my stomach turn. Glad to hear that you had a good weekend. CH I have semi given up on Christmas this year, it's already stressful enough losing a job, only do what you can and don't fret the rest. I find that when I have to do things for other people that I know might sabotage my efforts I get irritated. Like staying for dinner at my parents house when I know the food won't be very healthy or baking something for J when I know that I shouldn't consume it myself. It's torturous and easy to rebel against. Do what's right for you. 

CD, I know, you are right. And I have scaled back this year actually. But the family decided for a variety of reasons to have xmas at my house this year. And it's the first time mom will be away from home overnight since her accident this summer. And frankly the first time she has been back to our place since before the accident so it's kind of a big deal. And since the decorations are all pulled out but not up, it looks like a bomb went off. So I just had angst. And I think I felt cooped up by all the snow (must have about a foot of new powder now). And I was doing baking and it was hard to resist all the wonderful food I was making. And then the hubby was eating all kinds of foods in front of me. Which is normally ok, but I was "off". I'm focused today though. Had normal breakfast. Feel full. Hydrating. Have gym clothes already laid out. Got PT appt for 3 this afternoon (that will help alot too since I've been in quite a bit of pain for over a week now). and if it just keeps snowing, it should make for a LOVELY run tonight. Plus, I carbo and fat and protein loaded all day yesterday...I should be all set. LOL!!! 

I may get ambitious and take down the Halloween decorations soon. Rotting pumpkins are much easier to move when they are frozen solid. The tree in the window will probably have to do for Christmas lights this year.  

The holidays sucks, I mean they really put a lot of added stress on every body. I'm always amazed at how quickly I can pull something together and well when time is crunched. You will be fine. I know exactly how hard it is to watch a significant other eat whatever they want and you have to count and measure day in and out, SO FRUSTRATING. I am sure that alleviating your pain will make a HUGE difference I hope your appointment manages to be very helpful.  

I never even got my Halloween decorations out!!! WAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! And they're some of my favorite. Though maybe the 20 GIANT BINS of SNOWMEN kind of make it seem like I'm skewed towards this holiday..... but to put things in perspective, I'm not going to put them ALL out this year. Only SOME of the snowmen. That's big for me.