In my experience, that type of party (especially where the invite has a time frame rather than a "come at ____") is a drop in, extend your congratulations, have a drink and some food and go home kind of thing. No need to arrive right at the start (unless you know the people very well). I would go at around 6:00 or 6:30 to give the party a chance to get underway rather than be first at the door. Unless the invitation states otherwise, I think a gift of some sort is expected. Cash is appropriate. The amount would depend on how well you know the parents and your own financial circumstances. Flowers for the mom are not necessary - it's the son's day. Hope that helps :)
21 Jun 08 by member: evelyn64
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Well the mom is one of the people I stayed in touch with from my previous stint in Michigan 8 years ago, so I guess I would consider her very close. What is an appropriate gift for a boy then? I think the going rate might be a minimum of $50 so the gift should be around that much. (or is that too cheap?? God I feel like I lived under a rock for the past ten years!)
21 Jun 08 by member: caged liberty
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I think $50 is more than enough. When in doubt, put the shoe on the other foot and ask yourself, "If someone gave my son or daughter $50 for a graduation gift, how would I feel about it?" That will stear you in the right direction.
21 Jun 08 by member: evelyn64
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hmm..heres the thing...My kids would expect at least $100 per person LOL! Actually, you are right..if his mom were to give my son $50 that would be fine. The only thing is..I dont know what the rest of the people here would think was fine. Its a professional community, so everyone is a doctor or engineer, or something very successful and well off so the rates get higher in such places. ($50 is good Nisa..just shut up about what other people might give!!!)
21 Jun 08 by member: caged liberty
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I have the same problem except it's my hubby's nephew by marriage, and we are only included when there are gifts involved. Ours is 2-6, and even though hubby is working until 3 i am expected to lug the kiddes there to see the family. We are going to give a check, if i knew he was going away to college i was going to get him a bed, bath and beyond gift card to decorate his dorm. Good Luck.
21 Jun 08 by member: rdoqwn
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You've received some great advice from the others and I agree that $50 is a great amount. It also puts less pressure on the family when it comes time to reciprocate.
21 Jun 08 by member: juanab
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Thanks so much everyone. I had to go with a friend around 7.30pm because hubby was on call today. Gave $50 for the kid and a bouquet of flowers for the mom. She really appreciated it and said this is the second one I got today! Funny thing is...over 200 people attended this do....so I felt chuffed (just for you 08)that I was one of only two to think about mom!
22 Jun 08 by member: caged liberty
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so chuffed that you used the term for moi ;)! Very thoughtful on the flowers thing, BTW. You did great!
22 Jun 08 by member: 08willbegreat
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