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So I woke up this morning with my hand on my belly and was like, oh MY GOD! How did I let myself get back to where I was? I have let my lack of desire for life determine what I do with my body. I am 37 and have not got heavier than 285, but I was able to slim down to 249 and felt SOOOO good about myself. I was able to come down in size on my pants, I started to get my confidence again, and then BAM. I hit a wall and went downhill. I can tell you the exact date-9/24/09. Nicoles Birthday. Then my birthday, then thanksgiving, then Christmas.
So today I woke up, had a conversation with my husband about how unhappy he was, blah blah blah, and it occured to me, that I haven't been living for me or my son. I have been emotionally eating, and trying to convince myself that I could continue to eat and be fat and who cares because I'm not worth what I should be. So enough of the feeling sorry for myself and now I have to submit a new plan to life. This isn't about me. This is about the fact that you dont see any overweight people over the age of 75. This about the fact that I want to see what my son does for himself, and who he becomes, and to continue to live life and experience how beautiful it is. I really enjoy life and how it makes me feel. Not necessarily the drama, or the money probs, but life itself.
So today, this is about me. This is about taking care of me and living. I am starting fresh today.
Diet Calendar Entry for 22 March 2010:
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1580 kcal
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Fat: 62.19g | Prot: 67.47g | Carb: 199.84g.
Breakfast: OATMEAL TO GO, half & half. Lunch: banana, Low Calorie Salad Dressing, roma tomato, starkist chunk white albacore tuna, romaine lettuce. Dinner: sweet onion, diced tomatoes, french cut green beans, chicken sausage. Snacks/Other: 1% lowfat milk, macadamia nut, granny smith apple, plum, BREYERS YOCRUNCH. more...
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