Woodfairy's Journal, 10 June 2010

I should weigh in as it's been awhile, although I'm quite sure there's been no change. My weight was very stable for years, then last year (meds? stress? bad habits?) I gained exactly 10 pounds and am now stable there. My body seems to find a comfort zone and stay put, which is fine but I liked my *old* comfort zone--the one where my Ann Taylor pants fit! :P So I suppose my real goal is to get settled back into my former "default" instead of this new one.

This is tricky, as I know the real issue is making a mental adjustment. When I went veggie, 12 years ago now, there were ups and downs at first, and I won't say I've never make exceptions over the yeras, esp. because I do like shrimp. However, the thought process of "I'm vegetarian now" has become so ingrained that when I look at a menu, I don't "see" most of it--my eyes zoom in on the veggie options. I don't feel deprived, either; I don't think about--it's habit. Ditto on my current exercise routine--at first it seemed like a real nuisance to get back into the habit, but a few months on and it's second nature. Of course I'll be at the gym 5 times a week, says my brain. Duh!

So, it seems to be all about having habits that become second-nature. I'm annoyed that my exercise regime hasn't budged my weight one bit in 6 months. So, even if it's "really" the meds and not my "fault" (judge-y language!), I know the next step: cut way down on desserts and non-nutricious "extras". Make them a rare exception to the rule (like shrimp is to my veggie habits). This...is hard. I seem to have fallen into an easy habit of having fries with my veggie burger at the Grill, or dessert after dinner out with my husband. I will need to shift so that I don't "see" the dessert on the menu any more than I "see" the meat options, without feeling deprived and annoyed like I do now. It's a bigger struggle than I expected, but I have a track record of adjusting to a new default and then sticking to it, so I know I can manage it eventually!

Diet Calendar Entry for 10 June 2010:
1777 kcal Fat: 56.55g | Prot: 62.79g | Carb: 264.91g.   Breakfast: Luna Bar - Peanut Butter Cookie, coffee. Lunch: sweet potato fries, hamburger bun, Gardenburger, diet Coke. Dinner: kalamata olives, feta cheese, Tuscan White Bean Hummus, pita bread. Snacks/Other: fresco bean burrito, Rice Pudding, banana, odwalla protein. more...

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