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Weight History
showing entries 36 to 40 of 86
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09 July 2010
I think I hit a serious low yesterday. I ate at Checker's twice. After each burger I was like, this is gross, why am I doing this to myself. Then I got distracted with work. Then I ate there again last night for dinner and felt the same gross feeling after my trance-like feeding. There's no other way I could call it but that.
Needless to say I was feeling awful about myself and where I've ended up. I was on my knees crying out to God for forgiveness because obviously I went back to thinking that I could do this on my own. I went back to thinking that I GOT this. I didn't it.
Without God I am nothing.
So after my tearful plea, I got up and went grocery shopping. I picked up everything that was good for my body. I came home and stocked my fridge and cupboards with good-for-me foods. Then I set my alarm for 5:30am to go workout.
I woke up to the alarm this morning and didn't want to get up. I started thinking I can go tomorrow morning after I sleep in. Then I heard "you set that alarm for a reason." That shot me out of bed and into my workout clothes and down University Drive I drove to LA Fitness.
I said, "self, we're going to start off slow and do C25K week 1, day 1. That was easy last time we started it." This time, however, I could barely make it past the 5th interval! I was soooo upset that I couldn't finish the 20 minutes. I hopped off the treadmill and stretched while catching my breath. This is NOT happening! I worked really hard before...I once jogged for 15 minutes straight and I was 15lbs heavier, now I can't walk/jog for 20 minutes?? What the H-E-double hockey sticks?!?!!
While I was stretching, I pretty much accepted that this is me starting over. Or maybe it was the Checkers still in my system. Either way, I'm starting over...rebooting and recharging. I hopped on the elliptical and rocked out to some fast songs via Mariah, Alicia, Danity and the like for about 30 min.
After that I walked to my car feeling like I was part of an ending scene of the 1st movie of a trilogy.
On to the next chapter...
(9 comments)
01 July 2010
Hello July, very happy to see you! Half of the year is officially over and I'm looking forward to the next half. A lot has been done and accomplished in 6 months time for me. I went from planning a wedding, to calling it off, to searching for myself through God and finding a lot more than I thought I would...moving in a new place all while losing weight along the way...then I found myself being in a funk and finally starting to succeed in clawing my way out of it.
Whew! Those were an amazing six months. So many changes, inside and out. And there are so many more changes to come.
**Holding up my reusable water bottle** Here's to another amazing six months of revelation, growth and courage.
God Bless, buddies. :)
(11 comments)
23 June 2010
So, I've decided to weigh in. How can I move forward without assessing the situation first? This is how I put out proverbial "fires" at work. What damage has been done? What can we do to fix it? What processes can be implemented so that it doesn't happen again? Those are the three things I ask myself whenever something goes wrong at work. I certainly should be able to do it with my health.
So, here it is: about a 10lb gain...that's the damage, check.
I know how I got here, so I know how to get back to under 290. The same way I got there in the first place. Control my eating, exercise 4 times a week with AM HIIT cardio and PM weight training...will fix, check.
During the past week or so, I returned to a disillusioned state. A state where I believed I was doing everything right when in fact, everything was wrong. I convinced myself that eating certain foods was ok for just this one day. But that one day turned into the next day and the next day and eventually almost a full week. I don't believe in depriving myself, so I will have to plan for one day every two weeks where I can have portion-controlled foods that I would not otherwise enjoy every single day. It was a failure to plan, period. If I plan for such days and increase workouts around those 2 days of the month, I can and will be victorious in continuing my weight loss....this plan will be implemented so that I never get back here, check.
(9 comments)
22 June 2010
I've been in a funk! I want to get out of it. I'm trying to shake off this past weekend, but I'm finding it hard to. I'm at work now, but I just want to go the gym and get all my frustration out on an elliptical and not work until I'm ragged tired (one person is on vacation all week and we're really feeling it). I just want to scream! I feel like I've lost my mojo. I need to get it back. I don't know how. :( I got up this morning at 5am to go to my gym's spin class and I just went back to bed. After going to the bathroom, turning on the light and "officially" waking up....I just went back to bed and set my alarm for 7a. Boo on me! What??? Why couldn't I just get my workout clothes on? They were already set out on my dresser! :(
I need to get back.
(6 comments)
21 June 2010
I don't even want to look at the scale after the long weekend I had. So, I won't! :) I've had some of the best home cooked caribbean food this past weekend. From cuban food on thursday to guyanese food on sunday. That coupled with not getting in any exercise with the exception of dancing saturday night...there's no way that means good news on the scale for me. :p So, I'm jumping back on to regular eating habits and getting back on exercising regularly. :) Hope you have a great day buddies!
(2 comments)
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