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15 October 2012

14 October 2012

Note to self: STOP THE MADDNESS! You have worked too hard and want this too much to be backsliding the way you are. Sadly, I've done this before. Lose weight, start feeling pretty good about yourself and think you can eat whatever you want. I hope that is just me. I'm whats called a slow learner. I have been struggling for months now. I have returned to my old eatting habits. Fortunately, not fully but feel like it's only a matter of time. I'm afraid it may require surgical intervention at this point to get my head removed from my ass! It is pretty far up there. I need to formally review my weakness, acknowledge them, resolve to fix them. Starting with the positive; I have maintained my workout routine. Thank the good Lord too. Shudder to think what the scale would say right now if I hadn't. Still, it's time to step it up. Not sure I'm getting all the benifit from it. In my small, pea sized brain, I've let myself believe that after my work-outs my matabolism is higher and that eatting a couple donuts then doesn't really count. Hello fool. I have no illusions why I've put on weight. Stupidity can no longer be an excuse. In all honesty too, I believe I was happy with where I was. I wasn't where I had set my goal for but was ok settling with it. Felt good, looked so much better, happy with my progress. Again, small, narrow-minded thinking. Yes, I see a pattern here. My plan for recovery is this: Educate myself on proper nutrition and exercise. I've gotten a couple books to read to help. No excuse for not knowing. I'm also setting new goals for myself. At 225 pounds I can make an appointment with a plastic surgeon. Once under 200lbs I am bookiing a tropical vacation for my May birthday. There is some incentive! Have not been good at rewarding myself. Time to re-energize and move forward. I can go on from here. No beating myself up just looking honestly at my miss-steps, learning from them and re-committing to a healthier lifestyle. Sounds easy enough but we all know it is not. I'm not really looking for easy though. I'm looking for success. Success is straight head! Forward motion.

14 October 2012

Weigh-in: 251.0 lb lost so far: 89.0 lb still to go: 26.0 lb Diet followed poorly
   add comment gaining 2.0 lb a week

14 September 2012

Weigh-in: 242.6 lb lost so far: 97.4 lb still to go: 17.6 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (1 comment) losing 5.6 lb a week

13 September 2012

I had a great work-out this morning! Always feels so good after a strong, exhausting work-out. I do love being at the gym. What!? Yep, I just said that. Growth, wow. I watch others and copy what they do, particularly on the weights. The machines I've got down but the weight equipment is so foreign to me. Been doing better and drinking water too. Yay me. First time I've seen the scale move in a downward direction in a LONG time. Fingers crossed that it's a trend. Tomorrow is my one year anniversary of Fat Secret. Had so hoped to be further along. Still, I need to take time out and grin at myself for what I have accomplished. It truly is remarkable. I have been successful. I have improved my quality of life. I feel so much better. All good things. I am not finished yet. I will get to the promised land. It will just take longer than expected. But in all honesty, I never would have expected to get this far. I have pleasantly surprised myself. Time for an atta girl. Need to see my glass as half full. Attitude is darn near everything. So...Kudos to me, keep it up. Forward Motion.

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