Jules559's Journal, 19 February 2018

So, I fell off the wagon this week end and very badly so. We went to a braai on Saturday night and I was asked to make a pasta salad, which I did. Only half the salad made it to the party. I ate the other half. We slept over because it was far and a bad road and we didn't want to drive it in the dark. Probably just as well, because I wasn't careful with the alcohol either. I had several jugs of margaritas. Our lovely hosts made us pancakes and sconnes for breakfast, which I spread liberally with butter and jam. At least the butter was legal.

The preceeding two weeks have not been great either. I found out we are being retrenched at the end of May. I cant talk to anyone because I don't want my son finding out. He is in Matric, and we are holding thumbs that he will get his Protea Colours this year. He gave me his birthday present back last year because he decided it was too expensive and I could not afford it. This is the kind of child he is. I don't want him throwing competitions or losing on purpose just to save me the expense that goes with international competition. I also don't want him doing badly at school.

I feel a bit of depression coming on. My go to when I get down is alcohol and chocolate. I need to find a way to not let this affect my weightloss but I know it already. Now is the time to really dig deep and not let the stress get to me. Easier said than done and maybe I am not as strong and badass as I would like to think I am.

143.3 lb Lost so far: 32.6 lb.    Still to go: 15.4 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.