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I feel like I have given up, but not in a bad way. I still am maintaining my current weight like a champ, but I don't stick to a meal plan anymore, I am not super restrictive, and I can honestly say I don't work out as much as I would like to anymore. I can definitely tell a change in my body composition, especially since I've stopped weight lifting. I'm a little more pudgy than I would like, especially in my stomach area. It's just exhausting. Its exhausting trying to focus solely on this journey. I'm exhausted logging my food, and working out, and restricting myself. I am not angry at myself, not even a little. If I gained the weight back, then I would be angry. I just feel like I've given up in a way, and I feel okay with it, which is a scary thought. Its scary because I still have 25ish pounds to lose to get to my final goal weight. Its scary because I still haven't made it out past the 140's (which is my first actual goal). I still don't feel comfortable enough to wear a bikini. I still can't run, and I'm certain all my PRs have dropped. I just need to get back into the fitness mindset and stop being comfortable.
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