kingkeld's Journal, 27 January 2014

Good morning!

Wow. MASSIVE water retention. Damn!

It's been two days with poor food choices. I had given myself one day, but it slowly poured into the next. I better stop that.

I'm at 87 kilos today. WAY past what is acceptable, unless I'm gaining so much muscle that it's ridiculous.

Obviously, I'm not gaining muscle. Not that much, anyways.

...

I'm sure things are happening in the muscle department, though.

I'm rehabilitating my muscles nicely, after the month and a half off post-surgery. I'm recovering according to plan. At least, I think so. I will know today.

Today is another notch up at the gym. I will start doing three lifts, as I am starting my 3rd week after surgery.

It's gonna be heavy. Very heavy.

...

I feel sluggish after the poor choice of foods these last days.

I've hit my macros, the protein, the fat and the fiber. I just have had way too many carbs, and mostly junk ones. The stress is definitely making me want to eat more and it definitely makes me make bad decisions, but what can I do.

I try to do better. I see that restricting myself somewhat does help me with this, but I also know - as I wrote about yesterday - that I can't restrict myself too much while rebuilding muscle mass.

I will simply stay the course, and eat at maintenance level. That's it. I won't go over that number today. Promise. :)

This weekend wasn't as bad as last, though. Last weekend was a 10,000 calorie weekend. This one was 8. Keep in mind that I burned 6 of those already though daily activities. It's not all that bad, and definitely not a multi kilo fat gain.

Actually, looking at the numbers from Saturday morning and today, Monday morning, there is a 700g FAT weight difference. It's not all that bad. I can deal with that. I just gotta ensure that it doesn't happen too often, and these days it DOES happen too often.

Some of it is obviously stress. Some is laziness. But some also comes from me restricting calories.

I see it CLEARLY.

Friday, I was walking all day. I burned a LOT of calories. I was at a 1400 calorie deficit at the end of the day. The next day, I went nuts.

Pretty much the same happened the week before.

I think it really might be connected. Create a large deficit. Pig out the day after. Overeat. Bad move.

This is something I need to learn from.

I need to make sure that I eat ENOUGH on the days where I don't. I need to make sure that my body gets what it needs, or it will "force" me to compensate, and this is where I often lose control.

It's not like it's hard to eat ENOUGH. It just sometimes seems unneccessary. And sometimes I just don't make it all the way up there.

I will try to do better though.

...

Stress is still a big factor of my day. I try to not focus too much on it, but it's unavoidable. Every time it happens, my stomach churns. It sucks.

Not only because it makes me nervous and uncomfortable, but also because it makes me want to eat. I feel like I am constantly hungry, and I hate that.

I can't wait for all this crap to be done and over with, so I can move on. Get my life back on track.

Still, stay positive. It's not as easy as it usually is, but I'm all about positives. Get the best out of it, where ever you are. Also when it's tough.

...

I had 3 hours of sleep last night. Wife and I went to bed super early, but then the phone rang around 10 PM, and I couldn't fall asleep after. I got up at 1 AM, and have been up since then. :/

...

Today, I'm thankful for:
- Wife!
- Morning coffee!
- Intermittent fasting! It's actually very nice to NOT have to focus on breakfast.
- Workout and walk in a little bit.
- Longjons! It is FREEZING outside. I'm very leary about my walk, but I need that calorie burn. I want it. I have to have it. I have to! :)

Have a great Monday, and a great week! Life is good!
192.2 lb Lost so far: 149.5 lb.    Still to go: 4.9 lb.    Diet followed poorly.
on diet kingkeld's own diet   gaining 24.7 lb a week

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Comments 
Hope you have a better week, Keld! I'm entering my last week of strict calorie counting. Beginning on Feb 1, it's all IIFYM. I basically hit IIFYM macros today so interested to see what the scale looks like in the morning. All the best. Bill 
26 Jan 14 by member: Draglist
I know you will figure this out! You are after all THE Rock Star here in FS! Have a great day! 
26 Jan 14 by member: Lynn1958
Do not let the cause of your stress, defeat you. You have fought too long and too hard. This is YOUR body, your life, and no one can take this part of you away from you. You are strong. You are a warrior. Life is good! Roarrrrrr! 
26 Jan 14 by member: Mom2Boxers
Mom2, there is no chance that I will stay too far from the path. Promise. :) I will kick stress's ass, one way or another. LOL.  
26 Jan 14 by member: kingkeld
:-( on the weight front... At least you know what you should be doing. 
27 Jan 14 by member: Sk1nnyfuture
Meh, I'll be allright on the scale too. :) Give it a little time.  
27 Jan 14 by member: kingkeld
Water weight is better than other weight ... :-) 
27 Jan 14 by member: FullaBella
Water weight will go away relatively easily. Eating too much carbs makes your body to retain more water. Looks scary on the scale, but it is not permanent. You know all these, better than me... I just wanted to encourage you and ease your mind from the numbers on your scale.  
27 Jan 14 by member: MimiMeirah
I appreciate it, Mimi, and you are absolutely right. I am the king of fluctuations. LOL. It just freaks me out to see the numbers. I'm doing much better today. Smarter choices, better foods. I did find an awesome source of fiber today. More about that tomorrow. ;) 
27 Jan 14 by member: kingkeld

     
 

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