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Another day below 130. One more and I'll record it as an actual loss!
Hopefully, with this trend I should hopefully lose 2 more pounds before I go down to FL. That's all I want. When I weigh in tomorrow, I will update my goal to read 125. I think taking it 5 pounds at a time will make it seem more realistic for me.
When I first started here, I set my original goal for 120lbs. That was a 78 pound total loss. I was raring to go, so it didn't seem all that much. Once I got into the whole loss process, it seemed to take so long and when I was 150lbs, it seemed a lifetime away. I think that's why I abandoned all hope and when I got to 133 (a 65 pound) I got complacent. However, now I'm ready to reach that goal. And now being 10 pounds away from it doesn't seem like that much.
My friends all tell me I don't need to lose anymore weight. They tell me I look great and am crazy for wanting to go "that low." I honestly do not think that is a ridiculously low weight. They tell me that it isn't just a number on a scale, but for some reason I can't get past the number. I like it to be low. I mean I know that I don't want to look like a bag of bones. I have a friend who is a bit "gymorexic" and it isn't pretty. But if that is her prerogative, then let her do it.
This journey is to make me happy. I want to be the same person, inside and out. I want to love my body. Not that I don't now. I guess my losing is motivated a bit by vanity, but who doesn't want to lose a couple of vanity pounds? I want to look nice in a bathing suit when I go on vacation in July. I used to not care about what I looked like, and when I was 50+ pounds overweight, I would still wear a bikini, because I didn't see what everyone else saw.
Thinking back, I can't remember or pinpoint exactly when I started to gain weight. I was never rail thin. I also, was never overweight, until I was. That was when I decided I needed to do something. It literally took me about 12 hours to make the decision, and then I found this website that solidified it for me. This website made it all so easy, and so I did it. I don't know where I'd be right now if I hadn't found fat secret. Maybe I would have lost a few pounds, but decided it was too hard and given up, maybe I would have stuck with my goals, and made it this far, but who really knows? All I know is that when I look in the mirror I don't see that fat girl anymore, but I can always pick out a few places that I dislike. My little gut when I'm sitting down, or the way my hips stick out. Little things.
However, there are things that I like, too. I like that I HAVE hipbones now. I also like that I can go shopping and not hate everything I try on because it doesn't hide my stomach. I like that I have a collarbone. I also like that I can wear a dress and it doesn't look like two tree trunks sticking out of the bottom, too. I like that I don't have to wear pants all summer because I hate my legs. There are things that I like, but it is so crazy how there are always little nitpicks that I can find.
Oh well, I've babbled on enough for this morning. Hope everyone's week is going well, and as always if anyone has any questions or comments, please feel free to reach out to me! :)
Diet Calendar Entries for 14 April 2011:
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381 kcal
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Fat: 6.82g | Prot: 25.33g | Carb: 58.28g.
Breakfast: Chocolate Cheerios, Blue Diamond Almond Breeze. Lunch: Light Blue Cheese Wedges, Oven Roasted Chicken Breast, Frank's Hot Buffalo, La Banderita. Snacks/Other: Wint-O-Green Mints. more...
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1971 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Walking (brisk) - 4/mph - 1 hour, Sleeping - 8 hours, Resting - 6 hours and 15 minutes, Desk Work - 8 hours and 45 minutes. more...
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