Soulnoid's Journal, 16 May 2013

Day 476- All is going well.

Wanted to get a chance to talk about 'demons' or my demons. Demons for me are things or habits I do that I don't like about my myself. I have 2 big ones, spending money and how I act or what I say when I drink. I know I am better today than I was a year ago, but these things really get me pissed off when they come up.

Yes, it may be strange, but I am a guy who loves to shop. I love to wonder stores looking for a bargain. It is the rush you get when you find that bargain that get me going. But what has this lead to? A house full of crap and debt!!!! I also am one of those folks that once I buy one, I have to buy more. A good example is my running gear. I have enough running shirts to not have to do wash for a 2 weeks. But for some reason I keep buying shirts. I find a reason that the ones I have are not the right ones and the one I am getting is better. I am so tempted to buy running shoes, all of last years models are on such cheap sales right now. But I have to convince myself that I need to wear out my current active pair before I can buy new ones and that I should just buy the newer model. I have 3 pairs of good running shoes right now. I sit here every morning and read through who knows how many emails of from retailers, what a waist of my time! I don't buy anything, but I have to see what the offer is.... I am getting better and I am controlling myself more and more.

How I act and what I say when I drink are another story. When I am not drinking I am one of those folks that will politely tell you how it is, but when I drink, I tend to get right to the point and tell you what I think. I don't like that..... I do not drink near as much as I use to. I have been trying to work on why I drink, in most cases it is that I want to slip away and relax. The other big one is to be social, I am shy and find a drink will help me relax. What is funny, is when I am working I am not shy at all, but once I am done working, I fall to the back of the pack and watch. There is more I need to get out about this, just not clear on how I want to put it.

I know I am no where near done on this topic of demons and I know we all struggle with our own. This is just something I thought I needed to get started on getting out. I have hit on some of these in the past. There are a ton of little demons I need to fight also.

Chose your battles, not all lead to fruit.

Diet Calendar Entry for 16 May 2013:
1828 kcal Fat: 47.26g | Prot: 110.83g | Carb: 257.58g.   Breakfast: Hard-Boiled Egg, Apples, Bananas, Honeydew Melons, Strawberries, Kale, Parsley, Spinach, Trader Joe's Original Unsweetened Coconut Milk, Trader Joe's Chia Seeds. Lunch: Autumn Harvest Salad, Bistro Balsamic Lite Dressing. Dinner: Cooked Asparagus (from Fresh), Black Beans, Chicken Drumstick (Skin Not Eaten), Chicken Thigh (Skin Not Eaten). Snacks/Other: Apples, Apples, Honeydew Melons. more...
on diet Soulnoid's own diet  


There is a TedTalks out there about the paradox of choices-The more choices we have the less satisfied we are. The reason being-when we have options, we will always second guess our decision and wonder if the other item may have made us happier. Our society runs off the notion that it's great to have all these options-but really it cripples us and our happiness.  
23 May 13 by member: Lindsay6384


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