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Ugh. I'm having such a rough time with this. It was so hard to even convince myself to get out of bed yesterday. Depression is such a pain in the rear, especially around this time of year, when it's dark and everyone else is so happy. And I feel like I'm just the Grinch. There was a time when I loved holidays and people and the Christmas cheer. Now, it's like I want to hermit after work and not do anything.
Granted, working out has been helping a lot, but some days even when I work out, it's sort of a, "What's the point?" mentality. I've lost so much in the past year and while I know I've got a few angels watching over me, I can't help but miss them terribly. And I know that's part of the reason why I can't lose this weight the way I want to. When your emotions are all tangled together, it makes everything else more difficult.
I'm going to keep trying, to keep plugging along, even if I feel alone and isolated and sad. It's on those sad days that I need to push myself even harder. I keep telling myself I can't give up. I can't quit, although some days I really want to. I need to change myself or I'm heading for an early grave. And while I'd love to see the friends and family members I've lost, I don't want to do it too soon.
I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas. And please, remember to hold your loved ones close during the holiday season. You never know when you're not going to be able to anymore...
-Meg
Diet Calendar Entries for 21 December 2015:
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763 kcal
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Fat: 24.36g | Prot: 51.71g | Carb: 87.06g.
Breakfast: Whole Milk, Pure Protein Whey Protein Triple Chocolate Shake. Lunch: Progresso Vegetable Classics Tomato Basil Soup. more...
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4264 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Showering - 30 minutes, Desk Work - 8 hours, Grocery Shopping - 30 minutes, Cleaning - 30 minutes, Watching TV/Computer - 3 hours and 30 minutes, Sleeping - 9 hours, Resting - 1 hour and 50 minutes, Abdominal (Sit Ups) - 10 minutes. more...
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